Fever Inside Me
by o0Alien0o
Summary: Sakura had it all; a great career, a loving fiance, and a bright future...so why was she throwing it all away after a drunken night with her former sensei?
1. Chapter One

I was as pure as a river

But now I think I'm possessed

You put a fever inside me

And I've been cold since you left

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Chapter 1

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Sakura couldn't tell if she loved or hated the slow days at the hospital. On one hand, the busier days kept her moving constantly and the end of the day came fast. She didn't even have time to eat meals on those days. But, with so little time between patients, between running from one floor to the next, the paper work piled up higher and higher on her desk until she could barely see over the stack.

Which was her current predicament.

The kunoichi sighed and signed her signature to the bottom parchment that had been added to the ever growing thickness of the patients chart in front of her. Most were confidentiality forms and medication profiles that all needed the signature of whatever nurse had administered the medicine to the patient. As she scribbled her signature through the countless pages, a sparkling glint caught her eye.

She still hadn't gotten used to the diamond that sat on a silver band on her ring finger. Her throat tightened as she twisted the ring, turning the diamond toward her. She wasn't a fan of rings. They felt heavy on her hand, foreign and obtrusive. But it was a sign of love from her fiance. Masashi Kyo had asked her to be his wife after only 5 months of dating. She had instantly said yes, and despite the growing trepidation over the wedding, Sakura was in love. There was no reason to say anything but yes.

She was 22 years old, head nurse at the hospital and had already accomplished so much in her life as a ninja. Wasn't it time to accomplish what every woman wanted? The marriage, the loving family...Sakura's throat clenched and she blinked, turning back to her paper work and pushing all thoughts of wedding's and families out of her head.

Flipping the chart closed, Sakura spun in her cracked, leather chair. Her office was the definition of compact. Her desk had been slipped between two filing cabinets and she had just enough room to slip into her chair and swivel around to each cabinet. She filed several charts and turned back to her stack of paperwork. She had barely put a dent in the tower, but she was thrilled to see a sudden distraction in the form of her best friend standing at the door of her office.

Ino leaned against the door frame, her arms folded over the leather jacket that was zipped halfway up the woman's ample chest. The poor device looked like it was on the verge of bursting open at an moment. The blonde scowled at the mess scattered around her best friend's office before blowing a stray strand of hair from her face. "I take it you won't be done by 4?"

Sakura glanced at the clock on the wall to her left. 3:45. Wincing, the nurse brought a chart to her forehead, smacking herself in the nose. "I'm so sorry."

"Sakura!" Ino whined as she plopped into the old discarded waiting room chair that Sakura had snatched up after the hospital's renovation last month. "This is the third birthday you've forgotten you know."

"I know. I know. I'm an awful friend." Sakura pushed the stack of charts to the corner of her desk and reached across the table to grab her friend's hand. "Will you forgive me? I promise to bake you a huge chocolate cake to make up for it!" She pouted, watching Ino's face fall from annoyance to a smirk.

The blonde leaned forward and winked one of her blue eyes. "Only if you come out with me tonight!"

"Tonight? Kyo's making dinner for the two of us. It's kind of an anniversa-"

Ino sighed, throwing her arms up in the air as she slumped against the chair. "Seriously? We've hung out twice in the past five months since you met Kyo. Twice! And one of those was your engagement announcement so it doesn't count." Ino's bottom lip poked out as she crossed her arms over her chest. She had the pout down pat. Sakura wondered if she had used it more on her or the boys she dated. Sighing, the kunoichi ran a hand through her pink hair, pulling her nurses cap off and tossing it to the table.

She could reschedule with Kyo. Gods knew he had done it to her countless times over the last few months. He was the director of the hospital and was always running out with emergencies or changing their plans last minute because a benefactor was having a dinner that they just had to attend. Pursing her lips, Sakura nodded. "You know what, you're right. He'll understand. Let me go home and shower and I will meet you at your house at 7!"

Grinning brightly, Ino leapt from her chair and snatched her best friend in a hug, as if she suspected any other response from Sakura. Squeezed into the front of Ino's leather jacket Sakura shouted, "But only drinks! No dancing!"

It was 5:30 before Sakura could leave the hospital after trying to hurry through the rest of her paperwork. The evening was cool enough that she could run all the way home and not be completely drenched when she got there. It was odd not turning to the south to make her way to her old apartment. She had moved in with Kyo last month. His apartment was grand and in the poshest part of Konoha. Anything she craved, there was a restaurant for it at any time of night.

His apartment was four floors above the office he rented out and they had the entire floor to themselves. The doorman greeted Sakura and she smiled sheepishly, having not committed his name to memory yet. A nagging thought in the back of her head told her that it was easier not to remember his name, easier to forget him if her relationship with Kyo wouldn't work out.

She scoffed at the thought and brushed it deep under the rug in her mind and hurried to the solid gold elevator. Her reflection stared back at her on each wall and she glanced to the right as she pressed the '4' button. Pink hair fell from the bun she had haphazardly threw up earlier in the day and she grimaced at the dark circles under her eyes. She instead focused on the panel of buttons with no reflective surfaces until the doors slid open and she could hurry out.

Sakura quietly opened the door to the apartment she now shared. There was a place for everything and everything was always in its place. White marble floors, deep, rich colored rugs, and solid white walls made the space seem larger than it was. Her tennis shoes squeaked on the floor and she winced as Kyo lifted his head from the sauce pan he had been stirring. "Oh, you're home." He smiled.

Sakura shrugged out of her nurses coat and hung it on the rack beside the door before pausing at the dining room table. She gripped the back of a chair and chewed her lower lip as her fiance went back to the meal he was preparing. After the incident with a noodle fire last month, Sakura was no longer allowed to cook. She was barely even allowed in the kitchen.

Watching her fiance, Sakura tried to muster the courage to tell them she had to cancel on their evening. He was still in his black slacks and white button up shirt, sleeves rolled up to his elbows. The white linen fabric did little to hide the curve of his muscles and though he had never been a ninja, he was still adamant about keeping his body toned. Sakura blinked her eyes away from his biceps and opened her mouth to speak, but was quickly cut off.

"I'm afraid I've got bad news." Kyo called over his shoulder as he pulled two plates from the cabinet. "I'll have to leave after dinner. There's some funds that got misplaced and we're going to pull an all nighter to figure it all out." He set the plates down and drew a hand through his thick, black hair. He looked tired and Sakura smiled sympathetically knowing he had been putting in long hours lately. Secretly though, she was glad she didn't have to be the one to cancel and would be able to go out with Ino.

She was actually looking forward to it.

Sakura walked to the fridge and pulled the chilled bottle of wine from the rack. Kyo was fond of the expensive kind but the generic, cheap stuff was good with her. Spinning the cap off, Sakura poured a tall glass for herself and shook the bottle gently at him. "Want some?"

Kyo wrinkled his nose. "You know that stuff is awful. I don't see how you drink it. I've got some nice vintage for us last week. Why don't you drink that?" He suggested as he set the table with plates and silverware.

Ignoring his suggestion, Sakura sat at the table with her cheap wine in her hand and let her fiance serve her dinner. They ate in silence; Kyo rushing through the meal and Sakura barely taking a bite. He wiped his mouth with a napkin and pushed his chair back. With a peck on the girl's temple, Kyo said his goodbye and was gone for the night. The apartment was suddenly silent and empty but for Sakura and she sat at the dinner table, listening to the clock on the wall tick, tick, tick as she downed the last bit of wine. It warmed her tummy and cheeks and she decided to have one more glass before putting the dishes away and heading to Ino's.

An hour later, Sakura had showered, dressed, and drank another glass before walking to her friend's apartment. The night had grown a bit warmer and the sultry air made Sakura's hair stick to the back of her neck, but she was tipsy and felt great. She could smell rain but none fell, thankfully. It had been so long since she had a night out, rain wasn't going to ruin it.

Ino swung the door open after only two knocks and Sakura blinked her green eyes in surprise. "You're quick." She stated, ducking past the taller blonde.

"Yeah, and you're slow. It's 7:30! You said you'd be here at 7..." Ino's eyes glanced down Sakura's front and she sighed with a shake of her head. "And you'll need something else to wear. C'mon, forehead. Let's get you changed." The door shut with a click and Sakura glanced down at herself. She had picked something she thought was appropriate for going out; black slacks and a red, silk tank top. She scowled at the back of Ino as she strolled down the hall and into the bedroom.

"What's wrong with this?"

Ino raised an arched brow and threw open her closet doors as her friend leaned against the door frame. Having her outfit scoffed at made the warm and tipsy feeling Sakura had enjoyed so much vanish. She watched from the door as clothes soared and sailed across the room, each piece judged harshly with a 'nope', 'no way', or 'ugh' until finally Ino emerged from the depths of her walk-in with a black dress draped across her arm. "Here. Wear this." Ino left to grab her makeup bag from the bathroom and to give the other kunoichi enough time to change.

Sakura pursed her lips but followed orders. She was at least drunk enough not to argue this time. The dress itself was surprisingly comfortable and fell to a few inches above her knees. The back was cut low but the neckline fell perfectly to where Sakura was comfortable. Not too revealing, but definitely not prudish. She felt surprisingly sexy as she spun and studied her reflection. Ino came in this time, her own electric blue romper showing more skin. Her legs looked miles long and her chest full with her blonde hair up high on the back of her head. She looked like one of the fashion models in the magazines.

Ino hurried through the makeup process, rimming Sakura's eyes with dark shadow and black kohl, leaving her lips pale pink. "There. You don't look 15 years older than you are now." She snapped the cap back on her lipstick and tossed it into the bag before turning to snatch something off the bed. Sakura stared through the mirror as Ino shook a half filled bottle of alcohol. "A couple of birthday shots?" She asked with a devious smirk across her dark painted lips.

A couple of shots turned into five and by the time they had made it out into the humid night, Sakura was back to feeling warm and loose again. She walked arm in arm with Ino as they giggled and caught up on the latest gossip. It wasn't long until they found their way into the nightlife. Neon pinks and blues of the club signs blurred into a bright rainbow of colors against the black sky.

Sakura glanced at her reflection in the window of a tea shop that had closed for the night. She looked a bit drunker than she had thought she was.

"Look! It's Iruka-sensei!" Ino pointed across the street and Sakura jumped as she turned to stare at a group of four men strolling through the crowd. And the tallest one in the back struck Sakura suddenly. Hatake Kakashi. She hadn't seen her sensei in months but he was exactly the same. He hung back a bit, shuffling his feet with his hands dug deep in his pockets. He never seemed to be the type to go out dancing or socializing on the weekends, yet here he was.

Ino was halfway across the street before Sakura had shaken herself from her memories. Blowing pink locks from her face, she followed her friend into the dusty streets. Despite the alcohol swimming happily through Sakura's system, she suddenly felt very nervous.

She had yet to tell her former sensei about getting engaged and wondered how he would take it. Would he congratulate her, or tell her she was being foolish, even laugh? Would he even say anything to her at all? She hadn't realized she had stopped walking until Ino was greeting the group of Jounin happily. They all told her happy birthday and as Sakura stood a few paces behind her, she caught the white haired ninja's attention.

Rather curiously, Kakashi leaned his head to the side to look around Ino's blonde head and smiled at the pink haired kunoichi. Sakura felt her cheeks flush and her stomach fluttered slightly. "Sakura-chan?"

Kakashi asked, folding his arms over his chest. Ino stepped aside and looked back at the girl. With one swift motion, Sakura put her hands behind her back and slipped the ring off of her finger and placed it into the small purse at her side before stepping up to the group. "Hello Kakashi-sensei! It's been forever it seems like."

"Not quite that long, but yes it has been too long. How've you been?"

"Good. Just busy at the hospital, working a lot." She purposefully ignored Ino's raised eyebrow and prayed that the girl didn't mention her engagement or the fact that she wasn't wearing her ring suddenly. Iruka nodded and jerked his thumb toward a building they were heading toward. "We were just about to go have a drink. You two want to join us?" Sakura could almost feel the excitement buzzing off of her friend. Ino nodded quickly, her hair bouncing around her face.

She knew the blonde had a thing for older guys, but didn't think Iruka was much of her type. The Jounin turned to Sakura and lifted his eyebrows. "You coming?" Ino turned to give her a look that screamed for her to say yes. She didn't want to admit that she wouldn't have said no anyway.

Biting her lip, Sakura shrugged lightly before turning to the white haired ninja to her left. "Are you coming, Kakashi-sensei?"

The group turned to the Copy Ninja who sighed and looked out over Sakura's head to the darkened streets of Konoha before his exposed eye creased in the corner and he shrugged. "For a former student, of course."

Sakura felt the corners of her lips tug but she didn't want to seem too excited. The group waltzed into the building in single file, bypassing the long line waiting to get in. A few of the waiting guys shouted and complained about equality and unfairness but one look from the Jounin and they fell silent in an instant. Sakura giggled behind her hand as she stepped into the door, dim light sweeping over her.

The group made their way into a dance club whose name Sakura hadn't paid any attention to. She didn't know why she had taken her ring off. It felt like a beacon deep inside her purse, shining out into the dark night that said "look at me! I mean something! Don't ignore me"! But that's exactly what she did. Sakura clutched the bag at her side and ducked into the darkened entrance of the club. The red exit sign was the only light and cast such a strange glow around her. She could see Ino in front of her, blonde head tipped back as she laughed airily at something Iruka said. Both of the other men grinned down at her.

It was so easy for her to fit right in. She was an ever changing puzzle piece that could click right into where ever she needed to fit. Sakura swallowed and glanced over her shoulder to the man behind her. His face was shadowed, with the ruby light pouring around him. Kakashi's hand found its place along the small of Sakura's back and she felt her insides scream. Her dress dipped low in the back and she could feel the cool of his fingertips right under her ribs, sending a thousand thoughts fluttering through her head. But all of them were utterly ridiculous.

Following the group in front of her, Sakura ducked under a thick, black curtain and blinked in the flashing neon that blazed from the dancing area. The bar stretched under a flight of dimly lit stairs to the left of the entrance. Ino's face lit up at the sight of people dancing but as her eyes searched for Sakura she was met with disappointment. Dancing was one of Sakura's least favorite activities. She had never felt less graceful than she did when she attempted to dance. Ino leaned in beside her ear. "Please?"

Sakura shook her head and wrinkled her nose.

"It's my birthday!" Ino shouted over the pounding bass of the music. Sakura scowled and leaned over to her friend. "You can't use that excuse all night!"

"Fine! Find us a table." Ino thrust her finger up to the loft area where a few tables were scattered. She spun, her blonde hair swirling as she lead two of the other nin to the dance floor. Once she was out of sight, Sakura turned to the bar to attempt to order a drink but was met by two beers held between Kakashi's fingers. He smiled behind his mask and nodded for her to follow him.

She only hesitated for a moment, feeling quite silly standing in this club, wearing her borrowed dress and feeling like a toddler who found her mothers makeup. She wondered if she could run to the bathroom to wash her face but the remaining alcohol in her body convinced her to just forget it and try to have a good time. But the space on her skin where Kakashi had touched was still tingling, she realized.

Sakura pursed her lips and followed her former sensei up the iron steps, confused when he skipped the first few free tables and opted for a more secluded booth in the back corner. The red leather seats were cracked and scraped the back of her thighs as she slid in to the circular bench. She stayed on the opposite side from Kakashi, trying to ignore the fact that she was almost afraid to sit closer. She hadn't talked to him in nearly 6 months. Did he know about Kyo? Was he wondering why she hid her ring? If so, he didn't mention it or even let on that he had an inkling.

Kakashi slid one of the bottles across the table and Sakura caught it between both hands. She spun it nervously in a circle, making a ring of moisture on the wood. "Something wrong?" He asked, leaning an elbow on the table as he took a sip through his mask.

"No. Just thinking." Sakura flashed a smile and brought the bottle to her lips, letting the cool liquid quell her dry mouth. To her surprise, falling into a conversation with Kakashi was as easy as it used to be and before she realized it, she had consumed 5 more bottles of beer.

As she downed the last of the 6th bottle, Sakura blinked in surprise as they toppled over and clinked loudly against the three Kakashi had consumed. She covered a giggle with her hand and straightened the bottles back to standing. "I think I'm going to cut you off for a while." Kakashi mused with a smile.

"Oh, hush! I'm fine," she swiped her hand at him before placing it palm up before him on the sticky table top. "Now, where were you?"

Kakashi tapped his chin. "Ah, yes", he took her hand in his and pointed to a line across the base of her palm. "I do believe this means you'll have 26 children and they'll all be under the age of 5." He leaned closer and squeezed his eyes shut. "You're going to have yourself a handful."

Sakura giggled and laid her head against the back of the booth. During the time it took to drink her 6 beer, she had managed to slip closer and closer around the circular bench until finally she and Kakashi had met in the middle. Modesty was hard to keep up with and she found herself constantly tugging at her skirt to keep it at a respectable length but now, it was bunched around her thighs as she twisted in the seat so he could study her palm.

As Kakashi concentrated on the skin across her hand, Sakura glanced up. His head was bent close to hers and the tips of his gray hair almost tickled her temple. Suddenly she was hyper aware of the way his right arm was draped across the back of the booth, his fingers curled so that the back of his knuckles barely rest on her bare shoulder. When had the strap of her dress fallen? She could feel air on so much of her damp skin, sending a shiver across her spine.

Kakashi looked up at her, fingers still curled around hers. "Cold?" He asked softly, barely audible over the music pounding from the dance floor below. She wasn't cold in the least. In fact she could feel beads of sweat roll down the small of her back.

Sakura shook her head and smiled, ducking her head to hide the blush that spread across her cheeks. Her hair fell in a curtain of pink across her face. Her entire body froze as Kakashi's finger tucked the strands behind her ear, lingering for just a moment on the flesh of her neck. Her eyes closed on their own as she leaned in to his touch. It had been a while since she had felt a touch like that and it sent a familiar heat spreading through her body. She licked her lips and let her hand fall below the table, her fingers finding Kakashi's thigh. His muscles tightened at her touch but he didn't stop her. She didn't know if it was the alcohol, the music, being near a handsome man, or a combination of all three but she found herself wanting nothing more than to kiss him.

Sakura lifted her head, her lips inches away from the mask covering his own. She slid closer to him, her hand snaking it's way higher up his thigh. still, he didn't move. She hesitated for a second and flashes of Kyo's face flooded her mind. She was engaged! What the hell was she thinking?

Wincing at her own stupidity, Sakura whipped her hand away from her former sensei's lap and covered her face with it. "I'm engaged!" She shouted into the palms of her hands, her words muffled and distorted behind them. From beside her Kakashi rubbed at the back of his neck. "What was that?"

She dropped her hands and fumbled for the purse that she had forgotten on the other side of the booth, the side where she should have stayed. Her skirt bunched around her thighs but at that moment she didn't care. She just needed to get out of there. "Sakura-" Kakashi started to reach for her, concern filling his exposed eye but the kunoichi was out of his reach.

She spun as she stood and her hip banged against the table, making her stumble and brace herself against the bench seat. She cursed under her breath and smoothed her skirt down. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have done that. I'm engaged, you're...you. It's wrong and I appologize."

"Sakura, wait."

She was already halfway to the stairs, her hand on her forehead as she weaved in and out of the dancers and flirting couples. Dozens of eyes caught sight of her and she wished she could be invisible. Had they seen her stupid display of drunken flirting? Had they seen her almost kiss one of the most powerful ninja in Konoha?

Sweat rolled down her temple as she ignored her name being called behind her. She emerged from the club like she was pulling herself from the depths of the ocean and finally she sucked in a deep breath. The neon lights all around her didn't seem so romantic and sparkling. Now they were washed out, the spell they had once held over her gone and replaced with the bitter taste of alcohol and vomit that threatened to spill from her stomach. She hurried through the streets, leaving the loud nightlife far behind her.

"Sakura!" She had heard that tone before, when she had made a mistake in her training, had missed the target with her kunai throws. He was her sensei once again. Sighing, Sakura stopped but didn't turn around. There was no way she could look in his eye now. "I just want to go home. Please don't follow me." She forced the words out as she glanced back over her shoulder. She avoided his face and once she was sure he would stand in the street, hands stuffed in his pockets and not follow her, she hurried on her way.

There was nothing more that she wanted than to crawl into bed, pull the covers over her head and pretend this was just a bad dream. She just hoped Kyo wasn't home yet..

AN: Hello. Thank you for giving Chapter 1 a chance. This is my first Naruto fic. I had posted it to another site a while back, but took it down to revise it and do some tweaking. This story isn't meant to be canon. I love Kakashi's character and I love Sakura, of course I put them together. It will be drama, action adventure, and some violence. I'll try to update my warnings as the chapters progress :) Thanks for reading!


	2. Chapter Two

Chapter Two

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And I could care just a little bit less

But there's still a heart beating in my chest

And I, but I, try to keep that a secret

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The afternoon was dragging by for Sakura. She had made her rounds, finished her paperwork, and even managed to straighten and rearrange her office...all before her lunch hour. Now, she sat in the courtyard just outside the hospital, trying to force the rest of her sandwich down. But she couldn't finish it.

Sighing, she pushed the plate from her and instead, focused her attention on picking away at the chipped, blue paint of the picnic table. She counted the pieces and made them into a little pyramid. Anything to keep her mind busy...

A flash of Kakashi's masked face, inches from her own, her hand on his thigh, his fingers touching her shoulder flew through her mind like a tiny, infuriating movie. She winced and flicked the pyramid of paint chips away. No matter how much she stuffed in her mind to keep her thoughts in check, that night still managed to squeeze itself in. Tiny flashes while she's washing her hands, another when she's trying to take a patient's blood pressure. Each time they made her wince, as if she'd been pricked with a needle in the back of the neck.

Even when she did allow herself to think about, it made her stomach clench in tight knots. For the hours of the morning after, she tried to piece together the events. She knew she had had a lot to drink, between the wine, shots and beer. It had proved to be too much for her, apparently. She could remember being at Ino's house, remembered bumping into the boys in the street...

Sakura chipped at another piece on the table, narrowing her eyes on the wood grains. Why had he wanted a table so far from everyone else? Why had he let her drink so much?

No...he cut her off.

Frustrated, Sakura pushed up from the table and spun on her heel, nearly colliding into the person that happened to be right behind her. Sakura clutched her chest, startled, and blinked up into Ino's equally surprised face. "Geez, I was going to sneak up on you. Did you get strung?"

"What? No..."

"You jumped up like something bit you." Ino's eyes swept the table's bench for any buzzing insects before staring into her friend's flushed face. "You ok?"

Sakura nodded.

"You know you left really early the other night...What happened?" Sakura could see the look in her eyes..she knew something had happened and now she was sticking her nose where it didn't belong to hear the latest gossip. Ino was a good friend, but she was a great gossip. Any juicy piece of news and it would fly from her lips like wind through the trees.

Sakura waved her off and reached to grab her litter. "Nothing. I just can't handle my alcohol like I used to."

"Oh." Ino stated, her tone one of disbelief. "Because we thought something might have happened to you and Kakashi...He never came back either." Ino's voice dropped low and one eyelid closed in a slow, deliberate wink. It made all the color drain from the pink haired kunoichi's face. She squeezed the bag in her hands, crumpling the plastic with white knuckles. Is that what she thought?! That Sakura had left with her former sensei?!

Despite the pounding in her chest, Sakura tried hard to keep her face one of relaxation, entertained even at the thought of someting so preposterous! Sakura pushed Ino's shoulder with a heavy eye roll. "Oh, my God, you're gross. I...I got sick from the beer and didn't want to puke in front of everyone."

"Ok. So, he just left?"

Sakura shrugged. "I ran outside to throw up and then felt sick, so I went home. I'm not Kakashi-sensei's keeper. I don't know where he goes to when he's...you know," Sakura glanced toward the hospital and swallowed. "Not around."

"Hmm." Ino folded her arms over her chest and narrowed her blue eyes, knowing she wouldn't get anymore info from the girl. But, before she could open her mouth to argue her way into Sakura's business, another voice cut her off.

"Sakura. There you are." Shizune hurried through the courtyard, looking quite exhausted. Her black hair was disheveled, piled into a bun on top of her head with wisps flying in all directions. "Tsunade wishes to see you."

Sakura kept her heavy sigh to herself, knowing Shizune was her superior. She had been learning herbal medicines from the woman for the past several months. Nodding, Sakura cast a glance to her best friend, thankful for the interruption in their conversation. "Immediately." Shizune added, making the kunoichi blink in surprise.

"I still have to make afternoon rounds and-"

"I've got it covered. Please don't keep the Godaime waiting today. She's..." Shizune glanced between the two girls and sighed. "In a mood."

Sakura said her goodbyes and hurried through the streets to the Hokage building. She wished she had had a chance to change out of her nurse's uniform. Since the hospital had been bought by a private company, the uniform had been modified. Instead of her apron and white pants, she was now required to wear a nurse's dress.

It hit just below the knees, the white fabric stiff and unflattering. Even in her normal size, the buttons across the chest seemed to be too tight. It was almost like they had been designed to give a slight boost to the chest. Sakura always wore a camisole under the uniform to hide any cleavage that might peek through.

Sighing, she hiked the skirt up above her knees just a few inches, tucked the fabric so it would stay and quickened her pace. Feet aching, she made it through the main lobby of the Hokage office. It was busier than usual, with men waiting for business permits and families standing by to be made Konoha citizens.

The elevator doors shut behind her and she was thankful for the moment alone, resting her shoulder against the wall. She hadn't met with Tsunade for a few months, since she was informed that she would be working under Shizune. Whatever it was now, Sakura wasn't sure she was ready for it. Between the hospital and her personal life, it seemed that her plate was full. In a few months, she would have to start preparing for her wedding.

The elevator bell rang, jolting her from her thoughts. She stood a moment to catch her breath as the doors slid open. She took several deep breaths to steady her nerves. The door started to close and she caught one in her palm, pushing it back open as she made her way into the dim hallway that lead to Tsunade's office.

Making a right, Sakura hesitated, unable to ignore the tangle of knots in her stomach. She didn't have a very good feeling about this.

"'Yo."

The hairs on the back of her neck stood on end as the voice sank into her head. It was familiar in every way and made her nearly stumble in her steps. Sakura glanced over her shoulder to see Hatake Kakashi standing against the wall, one leg propped up, his face half covered by the worn cover of Icha Icha. He didn't even look up from his book.

"Hey." Sakura said awkwardly and cleared her throat. The hallway suddenly felt so small around them and she felt as if she were as close as they had been in the club, where she had drunkenly pawed at his thigh. She squeezed her eyes shut at the thought and turned back to the Hokage's door.

She hurriedly knocked, hoping to get out of the hallway as soon as she could. It took several minutes before she heard an answer muffled through the door. She wasn't exactly sure she had been bade an entrance, but standing out in the hallway with Kakashi twenty feet away was more intimidating than an angry Tsunade.

The office was dim, with the shades drawn shut to block out any natural lighting from the sun. The only light source was a small desk lamp that was turned away from the Godaime, who currently had her head in her hands on the desk. An empty liquer bottle sat on it's side on the edge of the desk and Sakura glanced from it to the woman before her before sliding the door shut behind her.

"Sit." Tsunade commanded harshly, not even looking up at the kunoichi. As Sakura dropped into one of the two chairs in front of the desk, the Hokage sighed heavily and pulled a scroll out of the top drawer beside her. She unfolded it and slid it toward the girl. Sakura recognized the symbol at the top of the scroll; it was from the Hidden Cloud village. Hesitantly, she pulled the scroll onto her lap and skimmed the words as Tsunade leaned back in her squeaking chair.

"It's from a small village in the mountains, one of our allies. A few of the village elders have fallen ill under strange circumstances. Their medical experts have narrowed it down to a poison but from there, they're at a loss." Tsunade stared at the nin, her eyes rimmed with dark circles, emphasizing the grave importance of the mission. "They've requested a poison expert."

Sakura scowled and looked up from the scroll on her lap. "Why not send Shizune? She's more of an expert than I am. I only just began studying under her." She swallowed hard, hoping the Hokage didn't think she was trying to back out of a mission. She was flattered that she had been considered for something like this. But still, there was so much she needed to do here. Her wedding was close...would she have time to get everything done if she left? There was no telling how long a mission like this could take.

"You know you're more than capable of handling this. Shizune's reports that your progress has been nothing short of outstanding. She's the one who recommended you." Tsunade's sunk in and she couldn't help feeling proud of herself and all the hard work she had been putting into learning from the herbalist. It definitely gave her a boost of confidence that she had been needing lately. Squeezing her lip between her teeth, Sakrua glanced down at the scroll in front of her.

There would be no telling how many missions she would even be offered after her wedding. She couldn't think of many kunoichis that stayed in the game after settling down. The thought sunk in her stomach like a stone and she squared her shoulders and looked the Hokage in the eyes. "Alright. What do I need?"

Tsunade sat back in her chair and crossed her legs at the knee. "I'll clear your access to the medical supply building and the green houses. The Hidden Cloud Shinobi have comprised a list of herbs they need and all those they've tried." She tossed a mission packet to the kunoichi who caught it easily. "You can start there."

Sakura stood and gathered the mission scroll and packet in her arms before turning to the door. Before she could open it, Tsunade stopped her. "Oh, did you happen to see Kakashi in the hallway?"

The name made her insides twist and Sakura closed her eyes and nodded before turning back to the woman. "Yes, did you want me to send him in?"

"No, he'll need to look over the mission details though. Be prepared to leave at dawn."

The knots in Sakura's stomach fell to the floor and she felt the walls of the room closing in around her as Tsunade's words clicked in her head. This wasn't a solo mission. "K-Kakashi sensei?"

"Yes, he's going to be your escort. I don't need my best medical nin injured or worse on this mission. Besides, he knows the way far better than anyone else." Tsuande gestured her hand toward the door and reached into a desk drawer to pull another bottle out, telling Sakura that their conversation was over.

Taking a deep breath, the pink haired kunoichi stepped into the hallway and slid the door closed behind her. Kakashi was still at the other end of the hallway, beyond the elevators, standing as aloof as he had been earlier. Did he not find this to be incredibly awkward like she did? Sakura could feel a headache creeping up the back of her skull.

Anyone else, that's all she had to request. She still had her hand on the doorknob to the Hokahe's office. It would be nothing to walk back in and request another escort. Even Chouji, chomping and scarfing down his bags of crisps, would be better. Clearing her throat, Sakura stepped away from the door and made her way toward her former sensei.

He turned a page in his book, ignoring her presence until she was right beside him. She held the scroll out to him but he made no move to take it. Sakura felt her cheeks flush as he looked over the top of his book. She darted her gaze away, still unable to face him. He took the scroll from her and she breathed a sigh of relief. "I guess we'll see each other in he morning." She spun on her heel and hurried toward the elevators, pressing the down arrow several times.

"Sakura." Kakashi called softly.

"Look," She sighed before turning back to face him. "We really don't have to talk about anything. I made a huge mistake and I think it would be best if we both just forgot the whole thing and ignore it." She squared her shoulders, proud of herself for having the guts to confront him about the ordeal.

Kakashi stared at her through a single eye, making her suddenly self conscious. She shifted on her feet as the elevator dinged loudly behind her. She could hear the doors open.

"Well, while I do agree with you, I was just going to tell you that you dropped this." He held out the list of herbs that the Hidden Cloud shinobis had created. Pursing her lips, Sakura snatched the list from his fingers, ignoring the slight chuckle that was muffled behind his mask. She spun back to the elevators just as the doors shut in her face. She slapped the button beside the doors and angrily stomped into the elevator.


	3. Chapter Three

I'll take the wrong path,

I think I'll go a little off track.

And now there's no way back

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.

.

While she debated on what to say to her fiance to reassure him she would be fine during her mission, her thoughts were interrupted by flashes of Kakashi-sensei's smirk hidden behind that mask. She truly had no idea why the whole situation was still bothering her. Nothing had happened beyond her drunkenly touching him and though they had almost kissed, they hadn't. So there was no reason for her to dwell on it.

So, she decided not to. There would be no more thinking about it, no more debating on whether or not to tell Kyo, no more distractions from the mission she was facing at dawn. Satisfied with her new idea to forget about the whole Kakashi nonsense, Sakura shifted the stuffed medical bags on her shoulder. She had spent nearly three hours in the green houses and medical supply house, taking every thing she could think to bring, no matter how small or trivial they were.

Even though her arms were aching from carrying the heavy bags, she still took her time making her way home to the apartment she shared with her fiance. Kyo knew of her life as a ninja and he accepted it, though he had made it clear that he didn't think she should be risking her life for the Village if they were going to be married soon. He had told her that he wanted to pamper his wife, to give her a life of luxury.

Sakura hadn't known what to say to that. She had never wanted nor needed a life like that. She was more than happy immersing herself in the duties of the hospital and the random missions that popped up here and there. She couldn't imagine sitting around, being pampered every day just because her fiance was wealthy.

Wrinkling her nose, Sakura crossed the street to her apartment building. She ignored the elevators and headed toward the stairs, needing the exercise if she were to leave at dawn in the morning. Her legs began to burn in that familiar ache and she used the discomfort to push herself harder. After the third floor, she took the steps two at a time. She held the hefty satchels on either shoulder, using them as weights.

Her breathing was ragged by the time she reached the floor in which she and Kyo shared their apartment. It had been a while since she had a proper work out and she was embarrassed by how winded she was. Four years ago, it wouldn't have affected her at all. Sakura shook her head at herself and rifled through her pocket for her key.

Before she could put it into the lock, the door swung open and her fiance stood facing her in the door frame. "Hey." She breathed, forcing a broad smile for him. When he made no attempt to return the gesture she realized he already knew about her leaving.

Could she have no secrets? Sighing, Sakura pushed her way into the apartment and dropped her bags by the door. She knew he was a very important person in the village. Hell, he was the reason their hospital was so advanced now. His donations brought in jobs and resources and the gesture didn't go unnoticed to Sakura.

But, that didn't give him the right to know everything about her. Especially before she could even decided how to tell him. Pursing her lips, she turned to the kitchen, hoping he would be the one to speak first. She didn't exactly know what to say to him.

"Sakura-"

"What?" She snapped, spinning in the kitchen to face him. He stood at the dining table, hands on the back of one of the chairs and staring at her as if he were about to say something along the lines of 'I'm not mad, just disappointed', just like her father used to say.

"Do you really have to go? Is there no one else, in the entire village, that could take your place?" He asked, a hint of sadness in his voice.

Her shoulders relaxed, and she let her arms fall at her sides. "I don't know. But, the Hokage personally asked me and I'm not going to tell her no." Averting her eyes, Sakura busied herself with the fridge. Her mouth was suddenly dry as a desert and she snatched the container of orange juice before gulping it down. She knew drinking from the bottle was something Kyo found disgusting and she knew she was acting like a petulant child but she didn't care.

"Where are you going?" He asked, folding his arms over his broad chest. His black sweater, so neatly pressed, stretched tight over his muscles. Sakura wiped her mouth with the back of her hand. "Hidden Cloud."

"It's almost winter...you'll catch your death up there."

"I'll be fine."

"Let me talk to Tsunade-sama and see if there is someone-"

"No." Sakura said through clenched teeth, her eyes set in a icy glare on him. Deep down she knew he was just scared for her, worried that she would be hurt or worse. But, he had never seen her as a ninja. He may not be confident in her abilities, but that didn't matter because she was. Sighing, Sakura relaxed a bit and crossed the room. She ran her fingers down the back of his arms, stepping close enough that her chest was against his. "I'll be fine. I promise."

Kyo nodded and pulled her into his arms. His hands were warm against her shoulders and she closed her eyes as she laid her head on his chest. "You won't be alone?"

Sakura swallowed and shook her head against his sweater. "Kakashi-sensei will be my escort."

He drew in a deep breath through his nose and nodded, pushing her away. "Perfect. I'll have a word with him before I leave, to assure your safety is his utmost importance." He was already slipping his sleeves in his coat before Sakura could let his words sink into her brain. Blinking, she whirled around.

"What?"

"I won't be long." Was all he said before the door slammed shut behind him. Sakura stood in the dining room of the blindingly white apartment, staring at the back of the door with her jaw slacked. She chewed her lip, hoping Kakashi had enough sense not to mention what had recently transpired between them. No. She could trust him.

Sighing, she pinched the bridge of her nose and made her way to the bathroom. A nice, hot shower sounded divine.

Four AM came much too early for the kunoichi and she had to peel herself from the warmth of her soft bed. Stretching her arms over her head, Sakura looked behind her, expecting to see the sleeping form of her fiance. But the sheets were still tucked and the pillows undisturbed. Sakura hurriedly wrapped her robe around her and tiptoed down the hall.

One of the lamps was still on and she could see Kyo on the couch, one arm draped over his head and the other grazing the floor. A bottle of liquor lay empty beside him. Pursing her lips, she decided that if he didn't care enough to come to bed, then she couldn't be bothered waking him up to say goodbye.

She dressed quickly in the clothes she had laid out the night before; a pair of tight fitting pants that were ideal for running long distances, and a red tank top. She zipped a light jacket up over her chest, pulled her hair into a pony tail and made her way to the front door. She was too proud to wake him, but she scribbled a quick goodbye on the message pad, grabbed her bags and headed out into the still dark streets.

The sun was barely starting to peek over the horizon as she made it to the front gates, where to no one's suprise Kakashi was not waiting. He would be late to his own wedding...if he ever decided to get married. He was a shinobi to his core, and probably made a decision a long time ago that that was all he could be.

Sakura sighed and leaned against the giant doors of the village. The shinobi on guard duty sat in the booth to the side, his arms stretched behind his head lazily. He ignored her for the most part and Sakura returned the gesture, checking her watch for the tenth time. It was ten after five in the morning and the sun was rising fast now.

Before long, it was glaring bright above her and the morning was in full swing. She had watched the guards switch, seen a few shops open for the day and still, no Kakashi. She tapped her foot angrily and swore under her breath that she would strangle the Copy Ninja when he decided to show his face.

It was only ten minutes later that Kakashi strolled up to the gates, waving happily to Sakura. "Sorry I'm late. I had a nightmare in the middle of the night and must've knocked my alarm clock off the bedside table. It's completely destroyed."

She rolled her eyes and lifted the straps of her backpack onto her shoulders. "Shove it. I couldn't care less." She said before stomping down the gravel road before her. Kakashi followed suit and sighed heavily toward the sky. "It was my favorite alarm clock, you know."

"Don't care."

"He even had a name."

Sakura's eyebrow rose on it's own and she peeked at him out of the corner of her eye. "Your alarm clock was a 'he'?"

"Mmm. Name was Herman." He glanced at her and smiled from behind the fabric of his mask. Sakura couldn't help snorting with laughter. "That's a horrible name." She muttered, rummaging in one of the compartments of her pack. She felt for the map and pulled it free as Kakashi mumbled about 'Herman' being a perfectly normal name for an alarm clock. She decided to ignore him and instead unfolded the map in front of her.

"I was thinking that if we head due north on this road," She nodded in the direction. "And cut northeast tomorrow, we should be there in two days." She was met with silence from the ninja beside her and she blew a strand of pink from her eyes and glanced at him.

Kakashi rubbed his chin in thought before shaking his head. "Won't work. These roads are closed." He poked a finger into the map. "So we'll have to take these, and if my memory is correct it will only take us a day and a half. Especially if we hurry." Sakura narrowed her eyes at him as she folded the map back into a square and pushed it back into her pack.

He grinned down at her. "You're cute when you try to take the lead."

Sakura's stomach hit the dusty road beneath her feet and she nearly faltered in her steps. With a grin, Kakashi ruffled the top of her head, took one of the packs from her shoulder and leapt into the tree tops. From thirty feet above her, he turned and called down, "You coming?"

Sakura blushed and smoothed her hair back into its ponytail before following after him. She hadn't expected him to call her cute, and though it definitely wasn't the first time, it certainly felt different. For one, she wasn't a little girl anymore fighting with two boy's for her sensei's attention.

Trying to ignore the flutter of her stomach as his words echoed in her head, Sakura followed the Copy Ninja into the trees. For an hour, they ran beside each other in silence and she was thankful for it. Neither expected a conversation, and Sakura was glad she didn't have to search for words she knew she would fumble over.

"Did Tsunade happen to mention the level this mission is ranked?" He asked after a long stretch of silence, looking back at her as they leapt off another tree branch. Frowning, Sakura tried to remember the upper left hand corner of the scroll where the rank was always placed.

"It's C, but can elevate to B depending on the circumstances. Why?"

He shrugged. "There's a fair share of hot springs in Lightning Country. I was just wondering if there'd be an opportunity to enjoy them." Sakura could see a smirk shift behind his mask.

She scoffed, trying not to think about Kakashi, nude in a hot spring tub. Shifting the pack on her shoulders to alleviate the strain against her muscles, the kunoichi picked up her pace and fell beside the Copy Ninja. "Forever lazy, Kakashi-sensei."

"It's lazy of me to want to relax in a hot pool?"

"No, it's lazy to be thinking of relaxing when we have a mission." She frowned and leapt over a broken tree branch that jutted out from the trunk in sharp shards. She faltered in her next step but recovered quickly, hoping Kakashi didn't think she was getting rusty.

"My mission is far different from yours," He said simply. "All I have to do is make sure you're protected from whatever dangers may come our way." Sakura focused on the path ahead of her, letting his words sink in. It was true, that he had a very different mission than she had. And hopefully, his would be an easy one. Escorting and guarding a capable shinobi would be a breeze for someone like Kakashi.

Sakura bit her bottom lip as thoughts of her sensei protecting her swarmed her mind, holding her close against him. Quickly, she shook the thoughts from her mind. "Yeah, well. I won't be joining you in those hot springs."

Kakashi glanced back at her and she could have sworn something dark passed over his face in a flash. "That's a shame." He replied in a voice she recognized...She had only heard it once before, in the club on Ino's birthday. And hearing it again sent a jolt running through her.

Her stomach clenched tightly and she gasped, ducking quickly to avoid smacking her forehead on a low hanging branch. She closed the gap between herself and Kakashi just a bit, her shoulder grazing his. Her breath caught in her throat and she averted her gaze quickly. "Kakashi-sensei…" She warned, not exactly sure what she should say next. 'Don't think about me in the hot springs? Don't tempt me to get in them with you? Just leave me alone?'.

No. He wasn't thinking about her like that.

Whatever dark thoughts that had appeared behind his eyes was gone now and he kept his gaze straight and stoic. "Relax, Sakura." He said, guiding them to the east just a bit.

Sakura swallowed. "I'm sorry. I'm just...I'm still a little ashamed of how I.." She trailed off, biting her lip as she was unable to finish the thought. From beside her, Kakashi chuckled softly and glanced back at her.

"Sakura. No matter how strongly you come on to me, I would never let anything happen between us. We're teammates but more importantly, we're friends." His smile was warm in his eyes and soothed the tight knot that had formed like a lead ball in Sakura's belly.

"Besides," Kakashi shrugged, slowing their speed to stop for a rest. "I'm not sure you could handle it." He dropped to the ground, leaving the pink haired kunoichi staring into the autumn leaves that surrounded her. She blinked at his words and used a branch over head to steady herself. Couldn't handle what, exactly?

Sakura was no virgin. She had lost her innocence a few years ago on one of the random drinking nights that Ino had demanded her company for. She should have learned then not to let the blonde get her so drunk. But, alas, her sexual partners peaked at a whopping two men, her fiance included.

Sex to Sakura was a necessary release to a situation brought on by raging hormones. Kyo had made love to her for the first time on their one month anniversary. It had been nice and though she was no expert, she knew that he was a very skilled lover. He made her feel good, but that was all sex was to her. Out of the six or seven times she had sex over the course of the last two years, she was sure there was nothing about it she couldn't handle.

Dropping down to the ground, she dusted her hands off on the side of her hips and folded her arms over her chest. Kakashi was kneeling beside his pack, rummaging for a protein bar and his water bottle. "You know, I've heard boys boast and brag about their prowess and let me tell you, I've also heard from the girls the night after and it's nothing special." She set stared hard at the back of his head, wishing she could tighten the knot on his headband.

As he fished out his water, Kakashi flipped it over in his hands and 'hmmed' to himself, as if he were mulling over her statement. He stood to his full height and turned to her, staring for a solid, silent minute. Sakura shifted on her feet, unable to understand how their conversation even turned to this in the first place. She had been so determined to keep things cool. "True. Boys do tend to over exaggerate their abilities..." His gaze narrowed just a bit, and the corner of his lips lifted the edge of his mask. "But, I'm not boy."

Sakura felt her shoulders sag and all the confidence she had in her argument deflated like a popped balloon. She watched him walk into the trees with his canteen and protein bar and knew she should use this moment to rest and rehydrate. But, she didn't feel like eating. What she needed was to clear her head of any thoughts that combined sex and Kakashi. She pulled her own pack around to her front and found her water. She barely got the lid off before she gulped down mouthfuls.

She was suddenly thankful for the shade overhead. Wiping the sweat off of her temple, she wondered when she had gotten so hot. After several minutes, Kakashi made his way back to her and put his canteen back in his pack. "I got a visit last night." He said as he rose, slipping the pack over his shoulders.

"Who?"

"I believe it was your fiance."

Fear ran cold down Sakura's spine and she could feel the world tilting slightly beneath her feet. She braced the tree trunk beside her with white knuckles. "Did...Did you tell him anything?"

Kakashi stared at her for a second and his apprehension only fueled Sakura's fear. "Of course I told him something. It would have been rude not to respond."

Anger swirled into the mix of emotions tearing through her insides and her fists clenced, ready to strink. "You know what I mean." She said through her teeth.

"He told me to keep a watch over you which I responded by reminding him that that was precisely my mission and I wouldn't let a hair on your head get harmed."

"So you didn't tell him about the other night?"

Kakashi shrugged and looked up into the trees. "Why would I tell your fiancé anything like that? Isn't that your responsibility?" He asked before leaping upward onto a branch. "Let's get a move on."

She couldn't 'get a move on' though. Her feet were stuck, planted firmly in the ground like the trees that surrounded her. Something in Kakashi's tone made her heart clench in guilt. Was he insinuating that she should have told Kyo? No. It was a mistake. Never going to happen again. Ever.


	4. Chapter Four

To let me dangle at a cruel angle

Oh my feet don't touch the floor

Sometimes you're half in and then you're half out

But you never close the door

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.

.

It was hours after nightfall when the paid of ninja decided to rest for the night. The further north they had went, the colder the temperature had dropped. Sakura's breath was heavy as she knealt to the tall grass and pulled her jacket out of her backpack. It had stood up against all the running she had been doing and looked only slightly wrinkled. She smoothed the white fabric as she slipped her arms inside and zipped it up to her chest.

They had stopped by an old outpost building that looked as if it had been abandoned for several years. The wood was warping from the weather and the shutters of the windows hung on their hinges haphazardly. Though she wasn't sure, Sakura had thought she saw a pair of eyes peeking out at her from one of the windows. She knew it was probably a rat, but the thought of something watching them made her shiver.

"Cold?" Kakashi asked as he unrolled his sleeping bag from his pack and shook it out. He glanced up at her, his gaze sweeping her length and settling briefly on her midsection. Sakura blushed and folded her arms over her chest, looking back at the outpost behind her. "Just feeling a bit creeped out."

Kakashi stood and dusted his hands off on his thighs, looking from the dilapidated outpost toward the road they had been following the past day. "Do you want to keep going?"

She shook her head, the end of her ponytail falling over her shoulder as she did so. "No, I'm fine." As Kakashi walked the perimeter to gather fire wood and scope the surrounding area out, Sakura busied herself with her sleeping bag. She unrolled it and fluffed it up as much as it would allow. It looked pathetic on the lumpy grass, flat like a deflated balloon. Still, it was something to keep her warm.

Sakura glanced a few feet away where the Copy Ninja's bag was rolled out. His looked awfully thick and plush compared to hers. Biting her lip, Sakura reached over and pushed on the corner of the dark green bag. It even felt plushier. She wondered if she could swap them out without him noticing.

Maybe he'll share... A tiny voice in her head asked with a giggle and she scowled as her cheeks flared at the idea. She turned away from his sleeping bag quickly and decided hers could use some fluffing. If nothing else, concentrating on something might get the image of being spooned up against Kakashi out of her head.

From beside her, a bundle of sticks hit the ground and she gasped, grabbing her chest. She spun as she stood and Kakashi stared at her with an eyebrow raised. "Are you alright? You're awfully jumpy."

"Yeah." She breathed, hoping he didn't see the pink of her cheeks. Instead of watching him busy himself with the fire, Sakura dug through her backpack for some food. She hoped that when they got to Lightning country, they could eat an enormous, hot meal. Granola and protein bars did little to satisfy.

By the time she had finished her meager dinner, the fire was roaring and doing a damn good job warming her up. She closed her eyes to the heat on her face as she pulled her knees up, hugging them to her chest. Silence fell around them save for the crackling of the fire. It seemed that whenever things were quiet and still, Sakura's thoughts turned to where she had forbade them to go.

He was in her head again, in flashes of images. He was there as he had been on Ino's birthday, smiling down at her in the neon glow of the night club, teasing her as they ran through the trees, his face dangerously close to hers as he attempted to read her palm. She had tried so hard to put that night behind her that she hadn't let herself remember the details. But now, days later, it filled her head so full that it left little room for anything else.

"What?" Kakashi asked, staring at her from over the flickering flames. She hadn't realized she had even been staring at him and now her entire body blushed. Shifting on her sleeping bag, Sakura shrugged out of her suddenly hot jacket and shrugged. What could she say? 'Sorry, I was just thinking about how you're consuming my thoughts lately'. Yeah, right.

"Uhm, nothing." She furrowed her brow and focused instead on a strand of thread that was loose from her shirt. She twisted it around her middle finger, hoping he believed her.

"Are you sure? You were staring at me like you were trying to make my head explode with your mind." His words made her scoff and she shook her head. Sakura leaned back on her elbows, surprised that the stars were so bright. They twinkled like a thousand diamonds above her. Taking in a deep breath, her mouth formed the words before she could even stop herself. "What did you mean earlier today?"

"About what?" He asked in a tone that Sakura was sure meant that he already knew what she was referring to. She didn't want to talk about it, but knew there was no getting out of it now. And besides, she genuinely was curious...

"About..." She licked her lips and laid down on her back, pulling her hair out from under her head. "About not being able to handle it."

Silence stretched between them, with nothing but the fire crakling as her answer. After several long moments, she was beginning to think he wasn't going to answer her. She glanced at him as he laid back on his own sleeping bag, folding his arms under his head. "Why do you ask?"

"I'm curious as to what you meant...or what you were implying."

"What do you think I meant?" It was her turn to be silent. She didn't want to answer, not because she couldn't but because her response made her blush just to think about it. There were somethings her former sensei just shouldn't know.

Still, she had gone this far. She turned back to the stars and watched one streak across the sky. "I think you were implying that I was inexperienced." Her voice was quiet, but she knew he would hear her.

"Sakura-"

"Because, I'm not...I could handle it." God, what was she doing? Even as she said the words, she knew they were wrong and shouldn't be coming out of her mouth. She should be focused on the mission, should be reading over the notes. Ashamed she hadn't even thought about the weeks ahead of her, Sakura hoped Kakashi wouldn't answer. She hoped he could put an end to her stupidity because it was apparent that she couldn't.

It was unnerving to her that these thoughts she was having weren't making her feel guilty because she had a fiance. She felt guiltier for ignoring her duties as a kunoichi.

Sakura felt the heat beside her body extinguish and she turned to see Kakashi standing above her, peering out into the distance through the smoke. "Get some sleep." He said quietly. "We'll have a long day tomorrow."

Before she could respond, he was walking away from their camp. Sakura sat up on her elbows and watched him disappear into the dark trees thirty yards away. After several long minutes of listening to the wind blow through the grass, Sakura collapsed on her sleeping bag, angry at herself for pushing so hard. She had obviously crossed a line and for what? It didn't prove anything, it hadn't made her right. All it had done was drive a wedge between her and a friend.

"You're such an idiot." She muttered to herself before rolling onto her side. She forced her eyes to shut, knowing tomorrow would be miserable enough without a decent sleep. At least tomorrow she would be able to start her mission and get one step to it being over and done with.

Lightning country, to say the least, was miserable. It had started raining an hour after they had set out after sun rise. There had been little talking besides things that strictly pertained to the mission and by the time the rain had started, it drowned out any conversation that could have started up.

Sakura was thankful for that at least. It wasn't an uncomfortable silence with the sound of a downpour ringing in your ears. She had watched in silence as the trees thinned out and the smooth, grassy valley turned into rocky bluffs. The road had thinned as well, and once they started moving up the mountains, it had become just a stepping path that circled up and up the cliffsides.

Her companion was a couple of yards ahead of her, leading the way, quick but cautious of the steep fall off the side of the path. Looking back behind her, the sight of the mountain dropping off made her a bit dizzy. She reached out for the rocks at her side to steady her and turned back around just in time to slam into the back of Kakashi. He spun to face her and reached out quickly, steadying her as she stumbled back.

Cheeks flaring, Sakura straightened and brushed her hair out of her face. "Careful." He warned, giving her a stern stare that she had seen many times growing up. She blushed harder and hoped her entire face wasn't glowing. With one word, he made her feel like she was 12 years old again.

"Sorry." She mumbled as he turned his back to her. She followed him, putting her feet only where his had been previously. No matter how much she wanted to, she refused to look back again.

They traveled up the sloping trail for another hour before Kakashi stopped, jumping down onto a cliffside where the path seemed to end. He stayed crouching as Sakaura followed him, followin his focused gaze. She could see thick fog covering the mountains ahead with rooftops poking through the cloud. Bridges were suspended like a spider web between them and the mountain.

Sakura stood as she took in the sight, following the maze of buildings all the way up the mountain. At the top stood an enormous, three tiered structure that she was almost certain belonged to the Kage. The entire village teetered on the edge of cliffs and bluffs and just the sight of it made Sakura feel a bit uneasy. She put a hand to her stomach to settle the unease that had found its home inside her.

"Rather intimidating, isn't it?" Kakashi mumbled as he stood to his full height and stepped besdie her. She nodded as she looked up at him and for the first time, she realized she actually missed Kyo. The thought of her warm, dry apartment made her a bit homesick and she wondered if they would be in the living room, reading by the fireplace.

Pursing her lips, Sakura pushed all thoughts of her fiance and their apartment deep under the rug in her mind and squared her shoulders. "Right. Let's go."

They were signed in by the shinobi guards at the gate of the village and after they were escorted right to the hospital. The bridges that wound up through the houses and shops made her stomach drop as they walked over them. She kept her gaze straight ahead and was thankful once they reached a round, wide building that was built on a thick cliff side. It was a smaller hospital than the one in Konoha, but the familiar scent of antiseptic spray and sterile cleaner immediately calmed her nerves.

It was just as if she walked in the hospital at home. But the more she looked around, the more it seemed so foreign. The lights were dim above and though there were nursed shuffling around, there wasn't the familiar sounds. Where were the patients, the kids, and families waiting in the sitting areas?

Kakashi followed Sakura as the guards pointed down a hall and told them they were expected. With a gulp, Sakura made her way to the end of the hall where double doors with a 'Keep Out' sign painted on them stood closed. She pushed the handle and poked her head inside. A nurses station was just beyond the doors and at the sight of Sakura's pink head, the two nurses waiting jumped up. "You must be from Konoha. We've been waiting." An older woman said, her voice gravely. Sakura could faintly smell the scent of stale scent of cigarettes coming from her clothes.

She led them further down the hall and into a room that was far brighter than the hallway. A table was set up with several files and notes strewn across it. A test tube rack was filled with vials of different colors and Sakura leaned in to glance at the notes. At the back of the room a curtain was set up. "Shun." The nurse whispered as she ducked around the corner. After some shuffling, Sakura watched a man walk from behind the curtain and pull the wire framed glasses from his face.

He was tall, a bit thick around the middle but friendly as he nodded to both she and Kakashi. "This is Shun." The nurse said with a smile. "He's been working day and night since the first incident."

Sakura smiled politely and slipped her backpack from her shoulders, setting it on the floor by the table. She pointed at the notes. "Are these yours?"

"Oh, yes. I'm sorry they're such a mess." Shun attempted to straighten a stack of them but seemed a bit distracted by the presence of Kakashi. Sakura glanced back at the ninja and smirked. He did seem a bit intimidating. Shun was tall but Kakashi stood nearly a head taller than him and his mask did little to make him appear friendly.

Sakura shrugged as she turned back to the table. "Don't worry about them. Do you think I could get a copy of these?" She tapped one of the charts labeled 'herbs' with her middle finger.

Shun pushed his glasses back onto his face and nodded enthusiastically. "O-of course. I've been working on one of our elders who was brought in two days ago." He glanced back at the curtain. "He's heavily sedated but you're welcome to take a look."

Sakura was across the room before he had a chance to ask. She made her way to the bed and stared at the elderly man in bed. Even sedated she could see the pain written across his face. His mouth hung open and she could hear the raspy breath from the fluid built up in his lungs. She snatched a pair of gloves from the wall behind her and slipped them on as she moved to the side of the bed. She was careful not to extend her chakra too much. Her plan was just to observe the damage enough to get an idea without alarming the patient.

She laid her hands on the man's rattling chest and pushed outward with, letting it sink into his body. The poison had devastated his body in such a short time. She let her chakra settle over his lungs and she pulled as much fluid as she could from them, allowing him a comfortable rest for the night.

Sighing, she pulled away from him and pulled her gloves off. She glanced up at Shun and caught a glimpse of Kakashi watching her. His eyes were fixed on her and her stomach tightened in knots at the sight. He had seen her work before. She had often bandaged him in the hospital after his missions but he looked at her now as if he were...incredibly proud.

Sakura tucked a strand of hair behind her ear and blushed turning back to the patient's chart. "I took out some fluid from his lungs. He should rest easier tonight but I want someone in this room every half hour." She gave a pointed look to the nurse who nodded quickly. Flipping the pages over on the clipboard, she handed it back to Shun. "And alert me if his condition changes. Now, where's the other patient?"

"He died this morning." Shun bowed his head in disappointment.

"I assume his body is still here?" Sakura asked, busying herself with the table of notes that Shun had been working on. She scooped them up into her arms as neatly as she could, pointing a thumb to the vials. "I'll want to look at it after we get settled in."

The woman who had lead them down the hall took it upon herself to show the two ninja to their quarters. She talked the entire way, mostly to herself, and Sakura was glad when she didn't expect a conversation in return. The apartment building they were settling into was only a short walk from the hospital.

"This one's yours." The woman said, twisting the knob on Sakura's bedroom door. She stepped in and glanced back as Kakashi was shown into the room directly across from her. Sakura dumped her pack on the bed and glanced around. A desk was set up at the end of the bed, under a small window that faced the mountain side. She drew the curtains and poked her head in a narrow doorway to the right. It was a bathroom and the shower called out to her, begging her to take a nice, long, hot shower that her body definitely needed.

It wasn't like the body was going anywhere. It would still be right in the morgue after her shower. Nodded, Sakura closed the door to her new home away from home and pulled her tank top over her head. She hurried back to the bathroom and turned the faucet to the hottest setting, smiling as steam filled the narrow space.

She stepped into the water and let it fall over her head as she leaned against the tile wall. The contrast of hot water to cold tile was surprisingly pleasing and she pushed a hand through her soaking hair. She stood for several minutes under the shower head, hoping it was washing away all the dirt and grime she had accumulated over the day.

Yesterday felt like a year ago and Sakura still wasn't sure if her conversations with Kakashi had even existed. They felt as if they could be a figment of her insufferable imagination, especially since he had such an uncanny ability to pretend like it had never happened. But just thinking about the way he had been looking at her, the things they had both said, made her entire body blush.

She bit her lip as she thought back to that little voice in her head, telling her to share a sleeping bag with the man. The thought of it had been sneaking its way into her head over the course of the day, even though she tried with all her might to ignore it. Sakura leaned her head back into the water and sighed as the heat flowed over the skin that had been against the cold tile.

Her nipples responded to the heat and she let her fingers slid across them. She let her imagination run a bit this time, and her head filled with the vision of Kakashi's hands against her flesh, pinching and grasping. She sighed and leaned her head back against the wall, letting on hand slip down her belly to her hips. Her fingers hesitated against her thigh and she bit her lip, knowing what she was doing was wrong.

She had a mission to do. She didn't have time to day dream for hours in the shower. Frustrated, Sakura washed quickly and stepped out of the shower into the steamed up bathroom. She dried off and dressed in fresh, clean clothes. After combing through her hair, she braided it from the top of her head down to her shoulder blades and decided she had wasted enough time.

Sakura opened the door to her new apartment and blinked at the sight of Kakashi, leaning against his own door, foot propped up behind him with that insufferable book under his nose. He glanced over the top of the book and she could see the side of his mask lift in a smirk. "Ready?" He asked, snapping the book closed.

She nodded, thankful that her cheeks were still pink from the heat of her shower. Looking at Kakashi now, her head was filled with the thoughts she had had moments ago and her body responded just as it had in the shower. "I'm ready."


	5. Chapter Five

And I've been thinking 'bout

How you say my name

You got my body spinning

Like a hurricane

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"Well, the smell is gone."

Sakura glanced at the man walking beside her and scoffed. "Excuse me? Are you implying I smelled bad?"

Kakashi shrugged and waved a hand in front of his face. "I'm not implying anything...but it was getting bad." Feigning offense, Sakura smacked his arm hard enough to sting before crossing her arms over her chest. She pursed her lips to keep from smiling and was relieved that they were joking with one another again.

As he rubbed his shoulder, Kakashi complained that his arm was practically useless now. "How am I supposed to do my job when you've incapacitated me?" He pulled his sleeve up to reveal a red mark the size of his thumb just above his elbow. His arm hung limp and he lifted it, just to let it drop back to his side.

Sakura turned on her heel and shrugged, throwing her hands in the air. They were barely out of the apartments, and Sakura's spirits were higher than they had been since they had left Konoha. Could it be possible that they were over what ever had come between them? Could it have really happened so fast?

It was as if she had taken a miracle shower that washed away all the grime and grit she had accumulated over the last few days as well as the inner turmoil she had been suffering from. It felt good.

As they made their way into the hospital, the nurses guided them toward the morgue down in the lower depths of the building. The temperatures dropped as they descended the stairs. Sakura was used to seeing dead bodies, having seen many in her short life. To train as a medical nin, cadavers were used as training tools. This would be no different to her.

The nurse who lead them down the stairs paused outside of the restricted area. "Shun will be down soon." She said quietly before hurrying back to her post. With a shrug, Sakura pushed open the doors and was met with a blast of cold air on her face. She shivered and pulled the sleeves of her jacket down her arms.

"Jeez. I forgot how cold it has to be in here." Her breath came out in tiny puffs as she looked over the registry hanging on a clipboard by the door. There were only four names on the white board. She scanned for the date brought in and narrowed it down to two different men, both in lockers right beside one another. "Here goes nothing." She said, gripping the handle.

Kakashi nodded as she pulled the door open. Cold mist poured to the floor and gathered around their feet before Sakura slid the body out onto the slab. The body was male and looked very old. His white hair fell past his elbows on the table and his face was wrinkled, even in death. "This has to be him."

"It is." Both Sakura and Kakashi whirled around to see the medical nin from before. He had a file under one arm and a black medical bag in the other. He set them both on a table in the corner before gesturing down at the body. "The cause of death was cardiac arrest, officially. It seemed the poison targeted the major organs of the bodies. The lungs are usually the first, as you saw earlier upstairs."

He offered Sakura a box of gloves before turning them toward Kakashi. Sakura smirked as he took a pair of gloves and slipped them on, with no intention to use them. Moving toward the body, Sakura pulled the white sheet down to the man's torso and let her hands hover just above the surface of his cold flesh. Pushing chakra into a cadaver always sent shivers down her spine. Usually, a person's own energy would push back a bit. There was no resistance now.

It felt as if she had plunged her hands into a tub of ice water and she closed her eyes against the empty feeling, focusing on letting her chakra flow around his organs. She reached his heart and gave a small gasp as she surrounded it. Cardiac arrest was an understatement. His heart felt as if it had been put into a blender. Shaking her head, she withdrew her chakra and stepped back to take her gloves off. "Do you know how the poison has been administered? Is it injected?"

"We're not sure. Each victim came into the hospital with the same symptoms; fever, chills, fatigue. They would worsen over the next few days and then it was as if they were having a massive heart attack." Shun swallowed and pushed his glasses further up his nose. "It wasn't until the third victim that we found any trace of poison at all. It reacts fast."

"Well, I'll need access to all of your notes. I've got the ones from earlier, but if you have anything at all..." The medic nodded and hurried across the room to the table. He opened the file and unzipped the bag, pulling out a few corked test tubes. "I gathered the rest of my research and the antidotes I've already tested."

"This will work, thank you." She smiled sweetly to him and tried to ignore the blush that flared across his face. Shun stepped aside so Sakura could gather his things. "So, you're fro Konoha?" He glanced between the two nin.

"Mmhm." She flipped through the papers on the table. Most were rudimentary notes, things she already knew from her mission scroll.

"And you're a poison expert?" His words made Sakura pause as she turned the page. She glanced up at him and shifted on her feet, blinking slowly. "Yes..."

Shun laughed and scratched the back of his head sheepishly. "I didn't mean any disrespect. You're just...young." He rushed, shaking his head. "Not young..I mean, pretty girls around here usually are too focused on shopping or dates. Medics aren't usually the pretty ones." From behind them, Kakashi made a sound that resembled a snort and he was quick to cover it with a random coughing fit. Sakura glared at him from over her shoulder.

If Shun noticed the sudden outburst, he didn't show it and instead moved to stand right next to the kunoichi, shuffling through the pages. "I made a note of all of the symptoms, and this page," he turned it over and pointed to a long paragraph. "Is about the trace amount of poison we managed to extract."

"I'll need access to a lab, Shun. Somewhere that won't be disturbed by anyone coming in and out, and I need a lock on the door. Can you provide that for me?" Sakura felt a little guilty smiling so sweetly at him and even more so when he nodded enthusiastically. He promised her he would find one suitable.

"Good. Now, I'm going to need to extract some more samples from the patient upstairs so I can start tonight."

By nightfall, Sakura was exhausted. She had managed to pull a minuscule amount of poison from the elder. It was enough to study for the time being, and hopefully it would be enough to develop of antidote from.

She had been sitting at the desk in her bedroom ever since, pouring over the files, the notes, and the patient charts. Even after two hours, she hadn't made any more sense of it than what was already written there. She was practically useless.

And starving.

Her stomach rumbled in response and she dropped the pencil on the pages, leaning back in her chair. She pressed her palms into her eyes and rubbed. Despite her eyes closed, the words from the files were burned into her brain and she shook them from her head. What she needed was a break...And food.

Before she could stand from the desk, a knock sounded behind her at the door. Sakura twisted in her chair and called for them to come in. Kakashi's familiar white head poked through door followed by a brown, paper bag. "Hungry?"

As she nodded, he made his way into the door and dropped the bag on the desk beside her. He scooped out a steaming container of dumplings and rice and set it in front of her. The smell made the kunoichi's mouth instantly water and she popped the lid off, ignoring the burn to her fingers. "Kakashi-sensei, you read my mind!"

She scooped a dumpling up and couldn't help the 'mm' sound that seemed to come from her stomach. After eating next to nothing since they had left Konoha, her stomach was thankful for a real meal instead of a brick of granola wrapped in plastic.

Kakashi smiled down at her, took his own food and sat cross legged in front of her bed. She felt bad for making him sit in the floor, but the dumplings were too tasty to care at the moment. "Have you had any luck?" He asked between bites and Sakura shook her head.

She resisted the urge to look over her shoulder to catch him with his mask down. She was too tired to play those juvenile games tonight. Instead, she shook her head with a small shrug, facing the desk. With her food in one hand, she pulled a few papers out of the stack. "Not really. It's all starting to blur together." She dropped the papers she had been working on and pushed them away.

"Understandable. From what I glanced at," He paused to chew. "his notes don't seem very organized." Sakura glanced at the cluttered desk before her. She sighed and put the lid back on her food, sipping a bit from her water bottle. "Mind if I have a look?"

Sakura glanced behind her to see him stand to his feet. He took their food boxes and set them on the floor by the desk. He sorted through several of her pages, separating them from Shun's chicken scratch writing. "You've made progress. At least now we can actually read it."

Sakura scoffed and leaned back in the chair. "I just want to get this solved as fast as I can so I can get home." To her fiance. To get married. To a life where she would be just like her mother. Sakura's heart raced a bit faster and felt as if she had a weight pushing down on her chest at the thought. The image of her, in a white apron, happily baking a pie for her perfect husband and perfect children flashed across her head and she suddenly regretted eating so many dumplings. She quickly shook the images from her head and instead focused on Kakashi's arms beside her, focusing on his skin to keep her stomach from rolling.

His sleeves were pushed up to his elbows and she could see several scars criss-crossed down his flesh from the many battles he had been in. He probably had thousands of scars across his body, from countless kunai and blades he had been up against. She wondered what they must look like, tiny white lines decorating the skin pulled over his muscles. What would they feel like under her fingers?

Sakura blinked and felt the color drain from her face as she realized she had traced her thumb down one of the more prominent scars of his elbow. Kakashi glanced over his shoulder at her, an eyebrow raised. "Y-you had a...string." She didn't know how she could feel so flushed and drained of color at the same time.

If he suspected anything else, he didn't show it. Instead, he raised his arm and inspected the sleeve of his shirt. "Oh. Thanks." He turned back to the papers and Sakura resisted the urge to smack herself in the forehead. Instead, she sat on her hands and leaned forward over the desk, mentally kicking her own ass over her stupidity. She bit her lip and watched him shuffle through her notes. "Mind if I make a copy of all this?"

"Go ahead. I need all the help I can get on this. I'm still not even sure why Tsunade-sama wanted me. This seems like something Shizune would solve in a heartbeat."

Kakashi dropped the papers back on the desk and turned, leaning a hip against the corner as he folded his arms over his chest. He looked down at Sakura and she kept her gaze on the rack of test tubes against the wall. Her cheeks were already blushing as much as they could just being near him, she didn't want to test it by looking him in the eye. "You don't give yourself enough credit. I've seen you work, both back home and on the field and it's very impressive, Sakura."

Yep, she was blushing even more now. She tucked a strand of hair behind her ear and shook her head. "It's basic stuff, really. Any medic can do it."

"But, they wouldn't. They would complain the whole time and yeah, back in the day you'd be one of the first to complain but you've grown up in a lot of ways. Especially as a ninja." There seemed to be no ending to how much he could make her blush. His approval meant the world to her, and to hear him speak so highly of her made her entire body tingle.

Sakura stared at his hands gripping the edge of the desk as he leaned against it, inches away from her knees. Her skin burned, as if she were sitting much too close to a fire. The heat spread slowly over her, up her twisting stomach, over her pounding heart, and to her face. She raised her chin and stared into his eyes, her pulse thundering through her veins.

She felt like two completely different people in that moment. She was split down the middle into a nice woman who was engaged to an amazing man, and this needy Jezebel who seemed to have awakened from a deep sleep that night at the club with Ino. And the latter wouldn't stop until she had humiliated Sakura and possibly ruined her engagement.

All I need is one night to see. The tiny voice in the back of her head was back and Sakura licked her lips. Her insides flared hot and she spoke before her sensible side could stop her. "You still don't believe me, though."

Kakashi narrowed his eyes on her and tilted his head to the side a bit. "About what?" Something in his tone told her he already knew what she was talking about.

Sakura moved her gaze back to his hands, so very close to her now. She could bump her knee against his knuckles so easily. "About what we talked about...last night." She watched his hands grip the desk harder, his fingers nearly white. Above her, Kakashi dipped his head to catch her gaze again, staring hard into her eyes.

"Why are you so adamant about this?"

"I'm just curious as to what you think is so damn hard for me to manage." She nearly grabbed for him as he pushed off the desk and paced the length of the room. Instead she turned back to the desk, knowing if she looked at him, she might not be able to resist the urges she was feeling.

"You're very confusing, you know that?"

Sakura turned in the chair and cocked her head to the side, raising a slender pink eyebrow on her forehead. "How so?" She stood and let her rear end rest against the desk as she folded her arms over her chest. From across the room, Kakashi paused his pacing and stared at her hard.

"Let's see. Before we left Konoha, you made it very clear that you made a mistake and wanted to put that night behind us. And yet, the moment we step outside the village, you won't let it go."

"You were the one who made the comment about me not being able to handle whatever it is you think makes you different than all the other guys." Shit. She was saying the wrong things judging by the fire that ignited behind Kakashi's gaze.

"Yeah, because I wanted to rile you up, not turn you on to me." His words made Sakura's hopes both deflate and flare inside her. Was that what he was doing? Was this strange, back and forth between them turning her on? "Isn't riling someone up the same as turning them on?"

"Is that what I'm doing to you?" Even with his face covered by his mask and headband, his expression was one of anger and frustration and Sakura knew it well. She had seen it a hundred times in her youth, and it almost made her turn away in shame...until she caught sight of something new. It was a look she had seen in Kyo's eyes, though not as intense, when he had been drinking and she wore nothing but a T-shirt and undies. He had told her 'he wanted her so bad' when she wore it and she definitely recognized the want in his gaze...

She swallowed hard as Kakashi took a step toward her. There was no more room between her bottom and the desk unless she sat on it. The closer he got to her, the more she debated on crawling completely over it to put it between them. She felt desperate and trapped, like a mouse caught by a hungry cat that wanted to play a bit before devouring her. "Sakura." Oh god, her name sounded so good whispered from his lips.

He stopped in front of her, though she didn't look up. She focused on the bed railing, the chair to her right, the bathroom door. Her eyes were on everything but him. As his hand rose, she caught her breath in her throat and let her eyes close. The back of his fingers grazed her jaw and she bit her lip to keep from whimpering.

She was practically sitting on the desk now, papers crumpled beneath her ass and her toes barely touching the ground. Kakashi inched forward, parting her legs with his until she felt him at the top of her thighs. This time, Sakura let herself look up at him.

"Are you turned on?"

She had to rack her brain for the answer. Was she? None of her past sexual partners had asked her that before. She thought back to all her previous experiences, grasping at the memory of her experienced, searching if she ever felt this scared, this curious, or this tense and came up empty handed. She gripped the table edge tightly in her fist to keep herself from falling.

She nodded helplessly, her eyes sliding closed again. The sheer intensity of her arousal was surprising and she couldn't concentrate on her thoughts between the feeling between her legs and the pounding of her heart.

His hands grazed the flesh of her arms and while one made its way up to the nape of her neck, he moved the other down to her hip. The warmth of his fingertips across her thighs made her gasp, her back arching enough to press her chest against his. He gripped the hair at the back of her head just tight enough to pull her head back.

She felt his breath across her collar bone, the fabric of his mask tickling the sensitive crook of her neck. His lips pressed gently against her skin and she let out a sigh. Something that usually tickled now sent jolts of pleasure darting through her body. As he pressed harder against her, Sakura's eyes snapped opened. She could feel him hard against her and the sudden realization that he was turned on made her entire body tense.

No. This was wrong.

She shouldn't be doing this.

Kakashi sensed her panic and in an instant, she felt the rush of cold as he put the entire room between them. Her skin felt cold without his burning against her and though she knew this was for the best, half of her still cried out at his absence.

She watched the door swing open and shut with a soft click behind him but it was a long moment before she allowed herself to move. Slowly she put her feet on the floor and pulled the papers out from beneath her. The room was deafeningly quiet, despite her ragged breath and if it were for the food boxes at her feet, she might question if he had been there at all.

As she stood to her feet, Sakura briefly touched her fingers between her thighs. Even though the fabric of her panties and leggings, her fingertips came away glistening. She debated briefly on whether to release the tension that had built up inside her but the thought of touching herself to the thought of Kakashi sent a wave of fresh guilt slamming over her.

She groaned and collapsed into the chair, touching the space on her neck where he had kissed. It had felt too good not to be real. But, what did it mean? Were they still friends, still colleagues or had they crossed a line they couldn't return from? The annoying Jezebel was unsurprisingly silent inside her head, and her sensible side was left clucking her tongue in disappointment.

"Oh, shut up." Sakura grumbled, letting her head fall to the desk with a echoing thump.


	6. Chapter Six

Always told you not to love me

Now look what you made me do

I got poison in my pocket

Told you I was bad news

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Sakura could feel the cold seeping in from around the door to her room. Scowling, she snatched the blanket from the bed and wrapped it around her shoulders before taking a quick peek out of her useless window. Though it was right against the mountain side, if she craned her neck just the right way she could see a small streak of sky between the building and the rocks. The clouds were thick and gray above her and a few flurries of snow swirled around in the gusts of wind.

She hadn't slept much the night before and had taken a trip to the green house in the early hours of the day. Their collection of herbs were abysmal. The woman tending to the plants had told Sakura that a few weeks ago their crop had been hit by a swarm of worms that ate through nearly everything.

'Convenient', Sakura thought as she rounded up what could be of use to her and headed back to the apartments. Despite the cold that lingered in the hallway, she hesitated outside Kakashi's door.

She strained her ears, listening for any signs of life while her mind raced to think of any possible excuse to knock on his door. None seemed remotely reasonable and so Sakura turned and made her way back in her room, where she sat for several hours pouring over notes, and formulas, and combinations of poison and herb. Pinching the bridge of her nose, Sakura leaned back in the chair, knowing she shoulder go to the hospital and try to extract more poison from the patient.

But, still she sat, slumped in her desk chair, glaring at her desk top. She traced a finger over the edge of the table where Kakashi's hands had gripped so tightly the night before. Her skin still remembered the way his breath had felt against her neck, so hot and yet it sent chills down her spine. Why had he been that close? She couldn't remember what started it.

Something stupid she had said, probably.

The thought of him so close to her, towering over her, his hands against her hips, clouded her mind like a fog and made all else melt away. No matter how many times she shook it from her head, it found its way back, snaking through the formulas she was preoccupied with. She tried to force herself to think of the flowers she had gathered earlier, lily of the valley, oleander and yew, and how she would integrate them into the antidote.

Sakura snatched a few pages from the desk and shook them out in front of her, narrowing her eyes on the words she had scribbled. The black ink wasted no time swirling together before her. She blinked but it was no use. Her brain refused to process the words. It had turned into a needy brat that only wanted one thing.

Growling in frustration, Sakura pushed off the chair and threw her blanket back onto the bed. She needed to get away from her room, distance herself from the place Kakashi had pressed himself against her. She groaned as her body responded to the memory of his cock pushed between her legs.

With wobbling knees, she thrust her coat over her arms, snatched a few relevant pages of notes and hurried out of her room. She kept her head down at her arms, ignoring the sight of his closed door. She didn't need to know what he was doing behind it. It was none of her business anyway.

She didn't stop until she was in the lab that Shun had closed off for her to research in. She shut the door and was thankful for the mindless tasks of setting up her notes, microscope, and samples on the table. Mindless tasks were just what she needed.

After a few hours of mixing herbs into antidotes, she was feeling better about the whole ordeal. Distance was exactly what she had been needing. Her fingers hadn't traced the edge of the table, or touched the spot across her neck where his lips had been so close-

No.

She wasn't going to let those thoughts sneak back in. Pursing her lips, Sakura took a deep breath through her nose and let it out slowly. Her mind cleared and she shifted in her chair, drawing the microscope closer, careful to not knock it into the row of test tubes filled with colorful mixes. She placed her eye over the eyepiece and focused the lenses until she could see the coursing violet poison on the slide.

Carefully, she added a drop of the mixture she had formed onto the slide and waited, watching with her pen ready to record the findings. She watched the violet cells of the poison circle her antidote and quiver away from it. It was the first sucess she had seen and her heart leapt in her chest.

From behind her, the door slid open and she spun in the chair, the color draining from her face at the sight of a figure covered in black from head to toe. She stood slowly, cursing herself for not alerting Kakashi to where she was going to be. "Who are you?" She asked, holding her pen tightly in her fist. It was the only weapon, besides the microscope and she would be damned if she lost her findings.

The figure didn't answer and instead moved in a flash of black that Sakura almost missed. She dodged the attack just in time to avoid missing a heel to the side of the head. She stumbled along side the table and kicked out with her foot, sending the chair into the figures gut. They deflected it easily and spun, arms swinging wildly.

Sakura rolled under the onslaught and rose quickly, slamming her foot into the attackers back, sending him sprawling across the table. In one swift motion, the figure swept an arm across her table, sending the vials and bottles spilling across her notes. He took the microscope and slammed it into the floor, where it shattered. Pieces of plastic and glass sprayed Sakura's legs and she leapt back to avoid contact with the poison.

From the corner of her eye, she could see a flash of silver in her foe's hands and she readied herself. The kunai soared by her head and she snatched its handle as it went. With a spin, she sent it flying back at the figure, nearly cheering when it landed deep into his chest. He stumbled back a few steps before disappearing into a puff of thick, black smoke.

"A shadow clone?"

Her stomach dropped as she looked at the research she had just lost. Hours were wasted as the pages dripped with multi-colored liquid. Sakura snatched a mask off the wall and held it up to her nose. From the door, several people had crowded to see what the commotion was. Shun pushed his way between several of the nurses and faltered in his steps at the sight of the destroyed lab. "W-what happened?" He asked, pushing his wire-framed glasses up his nose.

"Someone sent an assassin..." She muttered. Several of the women hurried from the hallway, refusing to put their life on the line for Sakura's mission.

Sakura hooked the mask behind her ears to keep it on her face and slipped a pair of gloves up her wrists. She glanced back at Shun who was slowly backing away from the room himself, hands held up as if he were surrendering. "I-I didn't sign up for this." He shook his head and retreated, leaving Sakura alone to salvage what was left of her hard work.

"Sakura." A stern voice behind her made her pulse quicken, but she didn't turn around. Instead, she held up a soaking piece of her note and narrowed her eyes, trying to make out the words on the page. The ink had bled badly, leaving the page indecipherable.

From beside her, Kakashi knealt down, dipping his head to examine her for any injuries. She waved him off and scooped a few pieces of microscope into her palm. "I'm fine." She mumbled through clenched teeth.

"Good. Why didn't you tell me where you were going?"

She was so not in the mood for a lecture on the importance of safety right now. Furrowing her brow, she snatched up the shattered pieces of the slide she had been studying and tossed them into a container for needles and broken glass. "I don't know."

"You don't know. Well, you do know that my mission is to protect you, right? Did it not occur to you that for me to protect you, I have to know where you are?" His tone was dripping with cynicism and Sakura felt her fingers curl into a fist. Was he seriously going to be an asshole right now?

Sakura sat back on her heels and stared at the man. She could feel the fire in her own gaze and it wasn't one of desire this time. Clenching her jaw, she forced herself not to explode with anger at him. Instead, she turned back to the busted microscope and continued picking pieces off the floor.

Kakashi sighed and stood before disappearing behind her. Her eyes burned with fresh, furious tears and she blinked them away the best she could. She wiped her sleeve across her eyes, avoiding her contaminated hands, and hoped he wouldn't notice she was crying. He stepped back to the mess with a broom and pan and Sakura sat back, watching through watery eyes as he swept it all up.

"I've got most of your notes copied. You can use mine." He said quietly as he dumped the trash into the bin and snapped the lid closed behind him. Sakura nodded, still kneeling on the floor, afraid to stand and afraid to speak. She didn't want to cry in front of her former sensei, not after everything they had been through.

She had fought beside him in a war, had been through much worse than this. Yet, seeing her pages covered in clumps of dried, ground plants made her throat constrict so tightly she almost couldn't breathe. She was sure it had more to do with her nerves being shot, her lack of sleep, and the cluster fuck of emotions that seemed to be running through her constantly than it did with her new setback.

She stripped off her gloves and tossed them into the trash bin before washing her hands thoroughly in the sink. "I was making progress." She said softly, barely heard over the sound of the running water. Kakashi's eyebrow raised as he looked down at her. "Oh?"

"I'll need to gather more supplies, but I think I'm on the right track." Sakura dried her hands and tossed the paper towel, leaning her hip against the counter. Her exhaustion hit her like a microscope to the face, but her mind was racing as fast as ever. Half of her was focused on the attack and her mission, while the other half just wanted to relieve her tension in the most basic way possible with her former sensei.

He looked good at the moment too. Apparently in his haste to hurry to the lab, he had neglected his coat and the skin tight shirt he had on under his vest showed every muscle he had across his upper body. Her mouth watered at the sight and she took a step closer to him. She was no where near as close as he had been last night, but she knew it was enough to elicit a response from him.

He stared down at her, his hand so still on the counter top. Sakura glanced down at it, wishing she could reach out and touch it, could press her lips to his fingertips. Gods, there was no denying how she wanted him now. It was as if he had poisoned her that night at the club, and now his venom was wreaking havoc on her body.

She looked up at him through her lashes, and it was as if all of her responsible, moral side was clouded over by the promiscuous alter ego she had developed. "Can I get those notes tonight?" The thought of staring down another page of research made her want to scream, but any excuse was good enough to get her inside Kakashi's room.

Kakashi's eye studied her for a long moment, falling from her eyes to her lips, lingering for several seconds. The air around them seemed thick with a heavy tension and it only seemed to act as fuel on the spark between them. Sakura could feel it growing inside herself and didn't know how much longer until her entire being was consumed.

"Sakura..." Oh, how she hated that tone. It immediately extinguished the flames that had licked at her insides. The sudden drop of her hormones had her exhaustion rushing back to her.

"Forget it." She spat with a roll of her eyes, spinning on her heel to stomp toward the door. Her arm was snatched quickly and she gasped as Kakashi pulled her back to the counter. He caught her with an arm around her waist before she stumbled while his fingers gripped the hair at the back of her neck.

Her eyes slid closed as the fever flared hot again inside her. With knees weak, she held onto him to keep herself standing, afraid she would melt to the floor at his feet if she didn't. She felt his breath across her lips first and sucked in a tiny breath of air before his masked mouth was on hers. She moaned against his lips and couldn't help her fingers as they snaked their way up his chest to his jaw.

He spun them so she was against the counter and he lifted her onto it, pulling her legs apart so he was between them. His hardness didn't frighten her this time. She almost abandoned her plan to pull his mask down so she could unbutton his pants. But her lips were begging for his and she had dreamt of kissing him for so long now.

Surprisingly, he let her pull the fabric down and the feel of his warm mouth moving across hers made her head spin. Gods, was she really kissing Kakashi? He tasted delicious, his hands felt amazing on her, and she couldn't understand why she hadn't let herself indulge in this the night at the club.

His vest hit the floor behind them before she even realized she had slipped it off of his shoulders. Her hands acted on their own, sliding down his arms and over his chest to make their way to the belt around his hips. She was trembling as she pulled at the buckle, sighing as it came free.

But, before she could do the same to the button on the front of his pants his lips left hers and her hands were suddenly empty. Whimpering, Sakura's eyes snapped open. She touched her fingers to her swollen lips and stared at Kakashi as he stood on the opposite side of the room, facing the table of assorted equipment she hadn't needed. "What-"

The door slid open and Shun shuffled in backwards, pulling a rolling cart with fresh supplies on it. "I'm sorry I left so abruptly earlier. I'm not used to assassins and the thought had me so frightened I just had to step away." He pushed his glasses up his nose and turned just as Sakura finished smoothing her hair back in its place.

Still on the counter top, she forced a smile and waved him off, hoping he didn't notice how pink her face was. He slid the cart into the space between the broken table and the wall before smiling back at her. "I brought you another microscope and some new test tubes. There's also some, uh, labels." He cast a glance to Kakashi, who still hadn't moved from the opposite side of the room.

"Thank you, Shun. I really appreciate all of your help. I'll start fresh in the morning."

"Of course," Shun smiled and risked a glance back to where the ninja stood. Kakashi had managed to move now, folding his arms over his chest as he leaned against the door frame. Sakura recognized the familiar, lazy half-lidded stare that was so infamous with Kakashi, but behind it sat annoyance.

They said their goodbyes and Shun shuffled from the room, leaving the door open behind him. Kakashi didn't make a move to close it, and Sakura's shoulders fell. They wouldn't be continuing where they left off. It was a long moment before she slid from the counter top and slipped her arms in her coat. "I'll just, uhm, get the notes tomorrow." She said quietly, slipping past the man she had almost fucked against the counter top.

Her cheeks flared at the thought and she tucked her hair behind her ear, waiting for Kakashi to step out into the hallway. Sakura slid the door shut and turned, blinking in surprise as he was already halfway down the hall.

There was only silence between them as they walked from the hospital to the apartment block. Kakashi purposefully stayed a few paces ahead of her, with not even a glance back to make sure she was still following. Sakura pulled her coat tighter around her body and wished she could just shrink to nothing and blow away like a snow flurry.

Even inside the building, Kakashi didn't say a word. He stood in front of his door, glancing over his shoulder as Sakura fished her keys from the pocket of her jacket. Her throat felt tight again and she swallowed, blinking the heat away from her eyes. "Good night." She mumbled, twisting her key in the lock.

Sakura slipped inside and ignored the look Kakashi cast at her from over his shoulder. She didn't want to think about what he might have been thinking about in that moment. She was almost certain he was thinking and feeling similar things to how she felt. Leaning against the door, Sakura shrugged out of her coat and kicked it aside. She touched her bottom lip gently and sighed.

She knew she should feel awful, for kissing another man and for kissing someone who was supposed to be her friend, but as she sat on the edge of her bed, finger still caressing her lip, Sakura couldn't help the small smile that tugged at her mouth.


	7. Chapter Seven

That sinking feeling

When you are leaving

All I believed in

Walks out my door

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Sakura raised her hand to Kakashi's door and hesitated at the last minute. Pursing her lips, she debated on whether to disturb him or not. On one hand, he had been pretty pissed at her for not letting him know where she had been yesterday but, on the other hand she really didn't want to face him. One look at him and she already knew she was going to have to keep herself under control.

She rolled her eyes and paced between their two doors for a moment before slipping back inside her own apartment. She couldn't face him. Not after the numerous dreams that had filled her night. Oh, but they were all amazing. She had never had an orgasm from a dream before, and didn't even think it was possible before last night.

Her cheeks flushed at the thought of her dreams and she leaned her back against the bedroom door. The desk across the room was still littered with a mess of reports and she sighed, knowing her mind needed to be focused on the mission. And to do that, she needed a certain ingredient that the greenhouses were out of...

Which brought her back to her previous predicament. She needed to tell Kakashi she was leaving to go mushroom hunting.

Of course, he would come along. It was his side of the mission after all to make sure she stayed safe.

Sakura turned and threw open her bedroom door, squaring her shoulders and making the final decision to just knock on his damn door and be an adult about it all. But, the sight of his tall frame standing outside her door took her by surprise and she hopped back a step. Kakashi's head was hanging a bit lower than his usual lazy way and his eye avoided hers as he glanced over her heavy, fur lined coat. "Going somewhere?" He asked quietly.

Sakura's mouth hung open like a fish out of water and she shook her head to make her brain think of something -anything- to say. "Mushrooms." Idiot. Stupid. Moron. Squeezing her eyes shut, she took a deep breath. "I mean. I'm going to pick mushrooms. The green house was all out and it was part of the antidote I was working on. "

"You do know that it's snowing right?"

"I know. But, I need these mushrooms. Would you want to help?" Sakura peeked up at Kakashi, hoping that her smile was just sweet enough that he couldn't resist. Groaning, he ran a hand through his hair, mussing it up a bit and only managing to make himself look more irresistible. "Do I want to? No. But I will. Let me grab my coat."

Sakura watched him retreat into his room and felt herself let out a sigh of relief. Their exchange wasn't as trying as she had expected it to be. If things could remain light between them, she figured she could make it through their day without wanting him to push her against the wall and have complete and total control over her.

Cheeks flushing, Sakura turned and made herself appear busy locking her apartment door and rifling through the bag at her side. Kakashi joined her in the hallway, zipping his jacket up to his chin before stuffing his hands into the pockets. They walked through the corridors in silence, dodging around the tenants that were setting up for an abysmal winter day. Several people were complaining to a maintenance man about the heaters in their apartments and Sakura smiled sympathetically to the man as they slipped passed.

Kakashi held the door open and a swirl of winter air burst into the foyer, surrounding Sakura and sending her body into shivers immediately. She cursed and pulled her jacket tightly around her, pulling the hood around her face. The mountains around them were nearly hidden completely by the snow clouds that sent down a mix of ice and flurries. Sleet stung Sakura's face and she debated on whether or not to put the mushroom picking off for a different day.

But no. No more delays. She needed this antidote to test on the elder in the hospital. She needed it to work. Kakashi pressed a hand to the small of her back and she gave a small start, blinking up at him through the snow. She braced herself against the cold and nodded up the trail behind the greenhouses before leading the way.

The path meandered up and around, up and around the mountain side and Sakura felt dizzy each time she looked back at the village growing smaller and smaller behind them. She shook her head and kept to the trail, sighing in relief as he led them out of the snow cloud. High up on the mountain, the air was thinner, but the wind was no where near as harsh and biting and the snow fell softly around them.

Several goats bleated at them as the pair made their way to a small plateau on the mountain side, covered in icy grass and a dozen mounds of-

"Poop." Sakura said with a heavy sigh.

"Excuse me?"

Scoffing, Sakura pulled her hood away from her face and pointed to one of the frozen mounds. "The mushrooms grow in the poop." She fished a pair of gloves out of the bag on her hip and handed them to Kakashi. He took them hesitantly and glanced from her to the gloves and to the ground. "You owe me." He muttered, slipping the gloves on.

Sakura waved him off and set about searching the piles for her mushrooms. "They'll have long, black stems and red caps. Oh, and don't eat them." She shook her hair from her eyes as she glanced back at the Copy Ninja, giggling just a bit at the sight of him.

He stood still and stared down at her with an impassive expression across his face. "You won't have to tell me twice." With that, he walked to the opposite side and set to work. Sakura watched him kneel to the ground, pausing for a bit to scratch one of the goats under the chin. She smiled and continued her digging.

The snow continued to fall gently around them and the only sounds that passed were the occasional bleats and cries of the goats, who didn't seem thrilled that their space was being invaded. Sakura stuffed the last bit of mushrooms into her sack and stood, turning to face her partner and paused in her steps.

Kakashi knelt in the middle of a circle of goats who all waited patiently as he fed them grass and leaves from the palms of his hands. The sack at his side was only half full but it was more than enough to work. Sakura felt a smile pulling at her lips before she made her way over to the goats and ninja. "I think we have enough."

Kakashi stood, peeling the gloves from his hands, careful not to touch them with his hands. "Good. I was getting a bit tired of digging through days old goat crap." He smiled down at her, the corner of his eyes creasing. She didn't know why, but in that second she felt all the emotion she had been keeping down and swept under the rug in her mind rushing through her. She was suddenly sweating, despite the cold and swallowed the dryness from her mouth.

Her mind raced for something to say. She needed to ask him what they were doing. She wanted to know whether or not she could expect something like last night to happen again. Her stomach clenched and she was afraid of the answer, either way.

Kakashi sensed her sudden change and ducked his head to catch her gaze. She tried hard to mask the flood of emotions coursing through her, but she was never good at hiding things, especially when they were always written on her face.

"Are you alright?"

"What are we doing?" It was out of her mouth before she could clamp her lips shut. Her breath was heavy now, her chest feeling tight in her coat. She pulled the zipper down and welcomed the rush of cold against her chest. "I mean..." She squeezed her eyes shut as Kakashi sighed and turned to stare back to the village, his face turning stoic and emotionless again. "What are we doing? I need to know if this was just..." She threw her hands in the air and swallowed the hard lump that threatened the back of her throat. "A one time thing, or even a two time thing. Because I feel like I'm going insane, Kakashi."

He pushed a hand through his hair, melting the snow that had gathered there and leaving darkened streaks through the silver. Sakura watched him, wishing she could do the same with her hands. Why hadn't she took advantage of their weakness and ran her fingers through his hair? She had always wondered how it felt.

"I don't know. The first time, you were supposed to push me away. I thought if I made an advance and you pushed me away, you would realize that you didn't want me."

"And last night?" She asked, her voice barely a whisper above the wind.

Kakashi hesitated before turning and looking down at her, and despite so much of his face hidden, she could see the guilt written in his eye. It was the guilt she should have been feeling. It felt as if she had just been kicked in the stomach as the realization struck her that she hadn't actually felt guilty for flirting with Kakashi-sensei...She felt guilty that she didn't regret any of this. She wanted it and wanted him, everything else was just an annoyance.

"I was weak. I should have apologized to you last night but for what its worth, I am sorry."

Sakura stared at the ground, wishing she knew what she wanted to say. He didn't say it, but she knew he would be strong enough to stop it next time and that thought made her feel worse. Her head ached and she knew fighting it wouldn't do them any good. Instead, she nodded. "It's ok. I'm sorry too. We're still friends right?" She looked at him through her snowy lashes and hoped he couldn't see the tears that started to sting her eyes.

With a sigh, Kakashi reached up and pushed a wildly blowing strand of hair behind her ear, letting his thumb graze her cheek. "Of course."

Sakura distracted herself the only way she knew how; by immersing herself completely in her work on the antidote. She had managed to extract the last bit of poison that coursed through the elder's body to use. He was looking awful now and his organs were failing. Though Shun suggested she use the lab he had secured for her, Sakura needed to be alone, with no interruptions.

She didn't want to be attacked again, have Shun walk in unannounced, or be so close to where she had kissed Kakashi. The thoughts of his lips sprang to her mind but she was quick to push them away. It was easier since their talk on the mountain side. He was going to make an effort to be strong and so should she.

She had managed to find a small office that no one in the hospital was using for the moment and set up her notes, microscope, and test tubes. She poured herself into the work and her initial intent to finish the mission as fast as possible became her goal once again. It took only a few hours to catch up to where she had been before the attack and she did feel safer with Kakashi standing guard out in the hallway.

Sighing, she sat back and scrubbed her eyes, relieved that she was able to regain what she had worked so hard for and lost. The antidote was working well enough now, but she would need more time before testing it on the elder. If he had that much time.

As she dropped her hands in her lap, Sakura caught a glimpse of the ring on her finger and her stomach clenched slightly. She could have sworn it looked bigger than it had before she had left Konoha. It was a beautiful ring and she had been so shocked to see it in the black, satin box when Kyo proposed. But, had she been excited?

She couldn't remember. The days around her engagement were a blur, between her friends and her mother's reaction and the party Kyo threw to announce it all. She couldn't even remember feeling anything. No, that wasn't right. Sakura shifted in her seat and put an eye back to the microscope.

Of course she felt something. She had been excited and relieved to see him propose. She could see in her mind everyone's grinning faces as they made their announcement at the party, her mother with tears in her eyes and Ino knocking back glasses of champagne all night...Ino hadn't been smiling, though.

"No! You will not let this happen." Sakura growled at herself, knowing exactly what she was doing to herself. She was letting doubt into her mind when she had no reason to. Kyo was still in Konoha, still waiting for her, and he still loved her. She still loved him! They would be married, they would have a future, and nothing was going to come between them.

A knock at the door sent her jolting back in her chair, nearly knocking the test tube rack over. She steadied it and called for them to come in. Kakashi poked his head in with a smile. "Just thought you'd like a cup of tea." He held a steaming mug in his fingers and Sakura smiled in relief.

A tea break seemed divine. She took the cup in her hands and sipped at the liquid, despite it's temperature. "Mm. This is delicious. They really know how to make their tea in Kumogakure." She took another sip before clearing a space to set the mug.

"Well, perhaps. But, I made this in the office across the hall. I hope Dr. Itami doesn't mind me using his kettle." He chuckled to himself as he sipped through his mask. Sakura felt her cheeks redden as the feel of his lips blazed through her mind. She distracted herself with her tea, hoping the burn on her tongue took her mind off of his mouth.

"If being a ninja ever stops working for you, you could go into the tea business."

Kakashi laughed and leaned against the filing cabinet behind the office door. He lifted his mug and inspected the liquid inside. "The thought has crossed my mind many times. But, I'm afraid I'm in this for life."

The thought of Kakashi-sensei working in a tea shop warmed her heart for some reason and she wondered how different her life would be if he hadn't been a ninja. Would they have met anyway, became friends? Would he have pursued her with no guilt?

No. That was silly. He would have been snagged by someone else a long time before she had met him. He was too handsome and mysterious to avoid the girls for very long, especially if he didn't have the duties of being a ninja. Sakura glanced up at him suddenly. "Have you ever been in love?"

Kakashi sputtered as he sipped his tea, coughed, and wiped at the small drops that landed on his mask as she looked at him in surprise. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean for that to come out of no where."

He waved her off and shook his head. "No. It's fine." He set his mug down on the filing cabinet and tilted his head in thought as he took a deep breath. "It's hard to say, really. There were times when I certainly thought I was, but it was either unrequited or bad indigestion. Why?" Sakura avoided his gaze and focused on the petri dishes on her desk, swirling the antidote around in the small sample of poison.

Maybe if she busied herself with work again, he wouldn't press the question that she didn't know the answer to. Why did she ask anything? She should know by now to keep her big mouth shut. She could feel his eye on her, boring a hole into the top of her head. "Have you?" He asked and she grew still, narrowing her eyes on the desk

She lifted her head slowly and stared at him. "Well, yeah. I mean, I wouldn't have agreed to marry someone if I weren't in love with them." Her throat clenched tightly around the end of her sentence and she swallowed hard, hoping he hadn't noticed her struggle. She grabbed a stack of papers and straightened them, pushing her test tubes to the back of the desk and managed to look anywhere but at the man standing so near to her that she could feel his body heat.

Sakura pushed away from the desk and stepped to the sink at the back of the office. She scrubbed her hands vigorously under the running water and tried to ignore the fact that he had followed her. She could feel him behind her. Her skin felt as if it had electricity flowing over it. She felt light, as if she could float away.

Her eyes slid closed as Kakashi touched the back of her arm, brushing his fingers against the skin just inside her elbow. Why couldn't they stop this? Is this what would happen now if they were alone together?

"Sakura!" With a gasp, Sakura spun to the door where a nurse and Shun stood, looking distraught. "Hurry!" He said, gasping in lungfuls of air as if he had ran miles to find her. "It's Elder Goro. It's not good."

Sakura's heart leapt into her throat and she pushed passed Kakashi, snatching on of the finished test tubes. "Go back to my room," She instructed her partner, tossing him the key to her apartment. "I need my medical bag on the back of my chair!" Kakashi caught the key easily in his palm as Sakura hurried after the pair. He stood for several minutes, staring out into the hallway, his mind a tangled, horrible mess.

With a deep sigh, he gathered Sakura's notes and the rest of her samples before heading back to the building they were staying in. He walked slow, enjoying the cold air that seemed to burn his lungs with each breath. It was a welcome feeling, one that he could use to keep his mind off of the ache that Sakura usually left him with.


	8. Chapter Eight

Crawling under my skin

You're not like anyone

I got a needle and thread

To sew this feeling on

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The hospital room was packed with nurses and Sakura had to push through to get around the curtain to where the patient's bed was. The machines were going off, beeping like crazy and for a few seconds, Sakura could only stare at the scene. Elder Goro writhed in pain, arching his back nearly a foot off of the bed, his eyes wide with terror.

A nurse coming around the curtain knocked Sakura's shoulder, snapping her from her momentary paralysis and she hurried to the bedside. As several women injected morphine to ease the pain, Sakura snapped her gloves on and concentrated her chakra to her palms. She gasped as it slipped into the elder's body. The pain was unimaginable. His heart beat so fast she couldn't even distinguish the beats and his liver had failed, unable to clear out the poison.

Sweat dripped down her forehead and she wiped it with her arm. There was nothing that could be done now. Even with the antidote his body was failing. All she knew to do was to try to ease his suffering. She forced her chakra to his heart, hoping she could ease the pounding. Before she could push into the muscle, the elder snatched her elbow and she gasped, her concentration faltering.

His mouth gaped and he fought to speak, face contorted in agony. With a final gasp, his eyes rolled back in his head and he collapsed on the bed, the heart monitor letting out on final, extended beep. It was deafening in the kunoichi's ears.

The nurses around her stared, their faces long and showing the disappointment of their defeat. "Call it." Sakura muttered, peeling the gloves from her hands. One of the nurses behind her spoke. "10:15." She pushed her way around the curtain and leaned against the counter to steady herself. Her knees felt weak and the edges of her vision turned black and hazy. She squeezed her eyes shut, hoping to get the image of his eyes out of her head. He looked at her, begging for help and she could do nothing. Was that what he was trying to say? He looked so haunted...

As the nurses filed around the room, turning off machines and writing the death time in his chart, the entire hospital building shuddered and Sakura gripped the counter. "What was that?" One of the nurses asked, stepping out into the hallway. Another tremble rocked the building, this time much closer and several of the women grabbed the walls for support.

Sakura's heart pounded hard in her throat as she stepped out into the hallway. People were panicking now and nurses emerged from the rooms of the hallway, their eyes filled with terror. A door at the end of the hall burst open and several people ran in, screaming. "We're being attacked!"

Another blast hit the hospital, sending several people to the floor. Sakura stepped over them and broke out into a run. The blasts didn't feel close enough to the hospital. She could feel them through the floor each time. Fear drained the color from her face as she sprinted for the stairs, leaping over the rails and down the steps until she was on the ground floor. The crowd here was in a full blown panic, with patients, nurses and workers all running in different directions.

The door to the hospital opened and smoke billowed in, covering the ceiling in dark ash as several ninja carried people in their arms. Sakura hurried through the sea of people, and turned once she was out in the bitter night air. The entire apartment building was engulfed in flames and she covered her mouth with her hands. Why had she told Kakashi to go back to the apartments?

Sakura's heart pounded so hard in her chest she felt faint, but she refused to slow down. The building was around the corner now and she turned down the long, rope bridge toward it. A hand snaked around her waist and spun her. A ninja with an oxygen mask struggled to hold her back. "You can't go in there! The whole thing is going to collapse!"

Sakura struggled against him, ready to use her entire chakra storage to punch her way into the building. She turned and wrenched his arm away from her, sending him stumbling back a few steps. He stared wide eyed at her and she made sure the glare in her eyes was as fiery as the building behind him.

Before she could run into the crumbling apartment block, someone else gripped her around the elbow and spun her. With a gasp, Sakura blinked up at the familiar sight of white hair and a masked face. Dust and ash covered Kakashi's hair and she had to resist the urge to brush it back, out of his eyes. Instead, she breathed a sigh of relief and pushed her own dirty hair from her face. "Are you alright? I thought for sure you would be in there because of me. I don't know what I would do if-" Her throat clenched around the words. She couldn't stand to think what could have been.

Kakashi smoothed a hand over her fly away hair and smiled. "I'm fine. I was just heading back to the hospital when it happened. I did manage to grab your supply bag, but everything else is gone."

She tried to focus on his words, but her stomach turned somersaults as his fingers grazed her jaw. She focused on her medical bag at his feet and thanked him breathlessly. "So, what do we do now?" Sakura turned to glance back at the building. Half of the structure had already collapsed, sliding down the mountainside, despite the water hoses that sprayed the inferno.

Kakashi stared up at the blaze,the light illuminating his face in a way that made Sakura bite her bottom lip. "I think it's time we pay the Raikage a visit."

The Raikage's office was enormous, nearly twice the size of Tsunade's, and was situated in the top floor of the round building that they had seen as they had made their way into the village. A black, fur rug stretched from the door to behind his desk and Sakura wondered what animal it could have came from.

At the desk, the Raikage sat in a tall, leather chair that was facing toward the windows. As the pair made their way further into the room, he slowly turned the chair to face them. Even sitting, Sakura could tell he was very tall. His shoulders were nearly as wide as the chair and he had a very intimidating presence. Kakashi spoke and she was thankful. She truly had no idea what to say to him. She listened instead as he gave an update to the situation and about how far along they were coming with an antidote.

The Raikage sat with his hands clasped, his eyes focused so intensely on Kakashi that she was afraid he was trying to make his head explode. He glanced at Sakura and she shifted uncomfortably on her feet. "I believe we are dealing with something far greater than I previously suspected. I will have a full team to guard the hospitals and extra men throughout the village to keep an eye out for this suspect." He kept his stare on her and she felt as if she were an inch tall. There was so much in his gaze and the majority of it was disappointment. It cut Sakura like a knife to the gut and she put a hand across her stomach as it ached.

Still, she held her head as high as she could and returned his stare with as much ferocity as she could gather. "How are you coming on the antidote?"

"Slowly," She swallowed before fishing through the bag at her side. "I would advise you to give this to the remaining village elders and yourself. If you start feeling ill at all, drink it. It won't stop the poison but it will slow it down and give us more time." She pulled several vials of dark, green liquid and handed them off to the Raikage. He clamped his hand over them and nodded quickly before slipping them into the drawer of his desk. Before he dismissed them, he sighed heavily.

"I don't think I need to remind you how important it is that this bastard is stopped."

"Trust me, I'm doing everything in my power to get this solved as quickly as I can." Sakura said, unable to risk glancing at her partner. He was stone still beside her, arms crossed over his chest and his eye set on the Kage.

The broad man nodded and stood, gesturing for them to be dismissed. "I'll have my assistant show you to your new living arrangements. I apologize for the lack of space. I did the best I could."

Sakura hadn't understood what he had meant until she stood in front of the door to their new apartment, her stomach twisted in knots. The room was bigger than the last but there were two beds, pushed against opposite walls. Her heart thumped like crazy as she glanced up at the man by her side. He peered into the room and 'hummed', rubbing his chin.

"I know it's cramped." The Kage's assistant said, hanging her head low. "We tried to find separate rooms but no one wanted to take the risk of housing you in case you were being targeted. I'm sorry." She gave a small bow before turning to make her way back down the tiny stairwell. Kakashi made his way in and dumped his things on the bed against the far right wall. If he was bothered by their new arrangements, he didn't show it.

Apparently, Sakura was the only one freaking out. She cleared her throat and stepped inside. Even though it was a bigger room, having Kakashi so close made it feel as if they were sharing a cardboard box. All of her belongings aside from her notes had been destroyed in the explosion, though her clothes had been replaced. She peeked inside on of the drawers of the dresser beside the bed and found fresh underwear and socks. At least she had clean clothes.

The thought of having fresh clothes made her long for a nice, hot bath and she stepped to the side to poke her head in a closed door. It was a small bathroom, with a standing shower calling out for her to step inside.

"Hungry?" Kakashi asked behind her. Sakura pursed her lips, debating on whether she wanted food or a shower first. "Yeah. I am. But I need a bath."

"I'll go pick us up something downstairs." He was out of the room before she could turn and say thanks, making her sigh. At least he was handling the situation like an adult. Sakura felt like she wanted to scream, laugh, and cry all at the same time.

Instead, she grabbed some fresh clothes, slipped into the bathroom and shed the ashy ruins of what she had been wearing. She kicked them all into the trash can and turned the faucet to the hottest setting, which barely gave off much steam. A tepid shower was better than nothing.

Stepping into the water was an other worldly experience. It broke through the dirt and grime that had caked on her skin and she instantly felt like a new woman. Sighing, she leaned her forehead against the tile wall and stood, enjoying the feel of being clean. She soaped and shampooed and by the time she was turning the water off, the door to their bedroom opened and Kakashi announced his return. She could hear the paper bags rustling on the other side of the desk.

How was he so calm?

Were they truly done with whatever weakness they had experienced? Sakura bit her lip as she swiped a palm across the foggy mirror. Her reflection was exactly as she feared. Bags sat heavy beneath her eyes and her hair was a tangled mess from the lack of conditioner. She brushed it out with her fingers as well as she could and grabbed her tooth brush. Her stomach growled in protest and she scowled, knowing she was letting her time alone drag on. Once she stepped out into the bedroom, it would be the room they shared. He would be sleeping a few feet away. They would be naked a few feet away from each other, with only a door blocking them.

She dressed in her new clothes, taking her time to make sure she looked at least half human before stepping out into the room. Kakashi stood with his back to Sakura staring down at the papers of the desk, a food bowl in one hand. She grabbed the bag from around him and took her food to her bed. Despite the rumbling in her empty tummy, she had to force herself to eat. She kept glancing to the man with his back to her as she took each bite.

He flipped a page in her notebook over and Sakura let her eyes sweep over his form, pausing to admire the litte things. She watched his hands as he pulled at the paper and held it out in front of him. His fingers were long and slender and she flushed thinking about what they were capable of doing to her. Even them touching her in the innocent places drove her crazy.

It seemed odd to her, that she never took time to truly appreciate how handsome he was. She had always been too blinded by Sasuke growing up but now that he was where ever he was, she had the veil lifted from her eyes. Kyo was one of the first men she had actually felt attracted to besides Sasuke and there was no doubt he was handsome. It was in a different way than Kakashi was though.

Kakashi was...different. The mask definitely added mystery, and what girl could resist a good secret? But, it was more than that. He was handsome and nice and sweet and an incredible kisser. That combination of things just shouldn't exist in a man. It wasn't fair that he was so unobtainable to her now.

Her fingers twitched angrily around the bowl of food growing cold in her hands. As absurd as it was, the alter ego inside her mind was furious that their affair had been stopped indefinitely. She wanted more and Sakura swallowed, realizing that she felt the same way.

"Do I have something on my face?" Kakashi asked, breaking Sakura's stare on the man. She blushed furiously and shook her head, pushing the food around her bowl with her chopsticks. God, how long had she been staring at him like that? He must think she was completely crazy.

"I'm just...tired. And I feel like every time I get a step ahead, something happens and sends us two step back." She closed her food container and set it aside. "I mean, now we have to wait for someone completely new gets poisoned? There's no telling how long that will take and we have to be stuck in here..." She gestured around their shared room and sighed, leaning back against the wall behind her.

Kakashi dusted his hands off and sat on his own mattress across from her, resting his elbows on his knees. He sighed and scrubbed his palm over his face. "I know. But, I want you to know that if this is too weird, I don't mind sleeping in the hallway." His mask lifted as he smiled.

"It's not weird. Tempting, but not weird." She mentally kicked herself for her words and reached to dump her trash in the bin by the desk. She grabbed at the blanket near the foot of the bed and laid back on her elbows. "I'm going to try to get some sleep." He nodded and stood, reaching to turn the overhead light off, leaving them washed in the soft glow of the lamp. He sat in the rolling chair by the desk and turned to glance at her from over his shoulder.

Sakura pulled the blankets around her shoulders and smiled softly to him. Even though half of her wished he would crawl into bed behind her, she was thankful that he had the strength to keep himself away from her. There would be no way she could resist and she just hoped he would continue to fight her off.

As Sakura's eyes closed, she snuggled down into the pillow. For the first time since they arrive at Kumogakure, she felt safe. She drifted off and dreamed of Kakashi flying her over the village, swooping down and around the buildings before they settled at the top of the mountain and had a picnic.


	9. Chapter Nine

The day was just as bleak and miserable as the last one in kumogakure. Wind howled around the mountains so fast Sakura had to brace herself against the railing on the bridge just to keep herself steady as she made her way back from getting a few supplies. The other villagers seemed quite used to the gale and walked without any assistance. Sakura scowled as they hid their snickers at her stumbling.

It had been a week since they had spoke to the Hokage. An entire week had passed with both Sakura and Kakashi tripping over each other in their tiny space. An entire week of temptations and by the eighth morning of staring at the back of his head, she had to get out. She wasn't even hungry, but had made a quick excuse to get food when he announced he would be taking a shower. The last thing she needed to see was him half naked and dripping wet.

Another gust blew against Sakura's back and she grit her teeth and hurried into their new building. She managed to force the door closed and sighed in relief as she pulled her hood away from her face. The stairs they used were a cramped, narrow hall inside a tiny shop that sold a little bit of everything. She was thankful the owners had let them use their spare space upstairs, but the numerous mop buckets, brooms and random crap on the steps really annoyed her. Could they not tidy up, just a bit?

Sakura untangled her foot from several damp mop strings and stomped up the remaining steps. The food bag on her wrist swung back and forth, hitting each wall. Luckily she hadn't gotten anything that could be damaged. Mostly she had meandered the aisles of the shop, hoping to buy enough time that she wouldn't see Kakashi fresh from the shower. Eventually she had grabbed a couple of cold bottles of water and a few snacks, ignoring the voice in the back of her head that urged her to hurry it up. It was the same voice she was having so much trouble controlling lately, the one that liked to make sneaky comments about how close he was standing to her, or how easy it would be to invite him into the bathroom for a shower together.

She fumbled with her key briefly before jamming it into the lock. The door opened to the same bedroom she had been feeling trapped in the past week. She saw the unmade beds first, then moved her gaze to the cluttered, paper strewn desk and then to the half naked figure stepping out of the bathroom. Kakashi had a towel to his head, rubbing his wet hair with it and Sakura felt like she had been punched in the gut at the sight. The little voice in her head sighed in delight as her body responded to the sight.

Luckily for her sensible side, he had dressed in a pair of black, linen pants but they hung low on his hips and did little to hide the lines of muscles that dipped beneath. She was faintly aware of the squeaking sound that formed in the back of her throat but she was too focused on the sight of his body to care. Kakashi pulled the towel from his head and blinked at her in surprise. He had a mask in place that stopped at his throat but she didn't think she would even notice if he hadn't had one. Her eyes begged not to be torn away from his chest.

She felt her arms fall to her sides and the plastic bag on her wrist hit the floor at her feet. In an instant, the thousands of things she wanted to do to him flashed like a movie through her mind. That tiny voice in her head screamed at her to move, to walk to him and do exactly what she wanted. "Sorry. I thought you would take longer." He said sheepishly, grabbing a shirt off his bed.

She wanted to say it was fine, but she was having a hard time forming words. As he slipped his shirt over his head, Sakura shook the thoughts from her mind and bent quickly to scoop up her bag. Clearing her throat, she dug through for one of the bottles of water and set it down hard on the corner of the desk. "I got us some food but it's pretty much all crap." She kept her head bent, hoping a curtain of pink hair would hide her blushing face and his body from her view.

She watched out of the corner of his eye as he took the water from the table. He was standing close enough that she could smell the soap and shampoo he used. Even the generic stuff they had been given smelled amazing on him. Her stomach clenched and she wondered how much longer she could rifle through the bag before he realized she was stalling. If he noticed how weird she was being, he didn't mention it and instead turned to the bed and sat.

Sakura shrugged out of her coat and tossed it across the back of the chair, forcing herself to keep her eyes straight ahead. If she looked back at him, with his hair dripping wet around his face and the memory of his body still so fresh in her mind, she wouldn't be able to resist the urges she was trying so hard to keep down. With shaking knees, she lowered herself into the chair and pulled at the wrapper of her candy bar.

She chewed it without tasting it and looked down at the papers without reading a word. There was nothing that could pull her thoughts away from him now. Kyo could walk in and slap her across the face and she would still only be able to think of Kakashi in the shower. Her head swam dizzily, her breath came in quick, tiny puffs, and she felt as if the walls were closing in on them. Her fingers curled around the candy bar, crushing it into tiny pieces. "God damnit." She muttered to herself, dropping her chocolate bar onto the desk.

"What was that?" Kakashi asked from behind her.

Sakura pushed herself away from the desk and spun the chair to face him. He sat back against the wall, arms folded over his chest with his feet stretched out to the floor, ankles crossed. He looked unbelievably tall and Sakura had a hard time keeping her eyes from the thin material of his pants that did very little to hide any shapes underneath. She swallowed hard and pushed a hand through her hair. "I said 'god damnit'...because I can't take this." She wagged a finger between the two of them. "This week, this mission, every second that's passed since that night at the bar. I feel like I'm two completely different people. One person who wants the life I had before all of this and another person who just wants you." The words tumbled from her mouth like a rockslide and she was powerless to stop it.

She was powerless to her feelings for Kakashi that she couldn't keep denying. They were there, crawling just under the surface of her skin, and she couldn't keep ignoring the itch. He didn't respond nor move and looked at her with those insufferably, half-lidded eyes. God, how could someone look so impassive and yet make her feel like she was completely consumed with desire? She knew he was resisting, being the stronger person like he told her he would be. But she was weak and her weakness burned bright inside her like a forest fire. She had become consumed by the burn.

"Do you know how hard it's been, being this close to you, knowing how it feels to kiss you but not being able to?" Her voice was quiet, but his eyes flickered over her face and she could see his strength faltering. The same desire she felt deep inside herself was blazing behind his eyes now. Her pulse bounded beneath her flesh. "I don't know what I've done to deserve this torture but I give up. I'm weak and I can't fight it anymore."

"Sakura-"

She shook her head, pink locks falling around her shoulders. "Don't." She stood from the chair and took a step toward him, her knees shaking. Kakashi sat up and put his elbows on his knees, lowering his head with a slight shake. She stopped short, close enough that she could feel his hair grazing her stomach and she had to force her hands to stay by her side. "I don't want to fight this anymore, Kakashi."

He lifted his head and stared up at her, his eyes no longer expressionless. They were pleading now as he searched her face, begging her to both make the first move and stop before something happened between them. But, she couldn't stop. Not this time. Raising her trembling fingers, she pushed them through the sides of his hair, droplets of water falling across the back of her hands. He closed his eyes and leaned into her touch, reaching out with his hands to take hold of her. Sakura sighed in relief as he slid his fingers up and over her hips slowly, as if savoring every inch he touched of her body.

He circled around to her backside and pulled her closer until her knees were on the bed on either side of his hips. She sat slowly on his lap and sucked in a tiny breath at the hardness that met her. He gripped her hips and pulled her hard against him. The feel of his cock so close to her, made her insides ignite and she leaned her head back, gripping his shoulders as they moved.

A knock at their bedroom door made Sakura immediately freeze and she put a hand to her mouth to hide the frustrated groan. The two sat still for several seconds, both hoping whoever it was would just go away. She was incredibly fed up with being interrupted everytime something amazing started to happen. As another knock, this time louder, echoed aroudn them Sakura let out a breath she hadn't realized she had been holding in. She stepped off of Kakashi as he crossed the room in a flash. He wrenched the door open so fast, the hinges creaked in protest. "What?" He snapped.

"You're needed at the hospital." One of the Raikage's guards announced, casting Sakura a glance over Kakashi's shoulder. "Immediately."

She nodded but her body was still shaking from being so close to him, so close to getting what she wanted, that she didn't move. "Now." The guard demanded, startling her out of her daze. She snatched her coat from the back of the chair and cast a nervous glance to Kakashi as he slid his own around his shoulders. She expected the same walls he always put up to be there but this time was different. He watched her walk pass him, his eyes apologetic and angry.

Sakura moved through the hallway in a fog, following the guard down the tiny staircase that he barely fit in. Her mind muddled with a thousand different things and she found it hard to concentrate on what was happening. It had been a week since their last victim died, an entire week of absolutely no leads, no new poisoning and the moment she let her feelings out...here they were. Her fingers curled into fists as they headed out into the gusts that hadn't ceased from before.

It felt like hours since she had been outside and she glanced up at the sky, expecting to see darkness but it had changed little from before. People were still mulling around, now staring curiously as she was escorted toward the hospital. They knew what it meant and most hurried away from her like she was carrying the plague.

Sakura turned as they headed up the steep climb to the hospital. She put a hand on the railing and took the steps two at a time just to keep up with the ninja ahead of her. The hospital building loomed overhead and she swallowed. Inside the walls was someone suffering a terrible fate and she was expected to save them. Her stomach clenched and she sucked in a deep, shaking breath, wishing she could turn back to the warmth and safety of their room. She ached to be back in his arms.

Once inside the hospital, it was as if she had been pulled into a hurricane. There was a whirlwind of commotion immediately; people rubber-necking in the hallways to see who the victim was, reporters shoving tape recorders under her nose as they asaulted her with asinine questions and Shun pulling her toward the hospial room. Sakura stumbled and had no time to glance back at Kakashi as she was stripped of her coat and handed a pair of sterile gloves.

She pulled them on as Shun pulled back the curtain, revealing a very small, young woman. She couldn't have been more than fourteen and Sakura could only stare in bewilderment at the writhing, sweating body on the bed. The girl's forehead was creased as she groaned in pain, kicking the sheets off of her legs. The door behind Sakura slammed shut, snapping her out of her daze.

She stepped up to the bed and put her hands against the girl's stomach. "When was she brougth in?"

"Half an hour ago." A woman responded as they slid the IV needle into the girl's arm. Sakura waiting until they got the drip going before she gathered her chakra and let it drop into the girl's body. She moved from the lungs to the heart, satisfied that they were stressed, but relatively free of poison. Sakura hurried to her liver and frowned. It was wrought with poison but that wasn't necessarily a bad sign. Sweat built up over her brow as she pulled at the foreign chemical in the liver. A little under half had been metabolised and she pulled at the rest, desperate to get as much as she could. If she could get her antidote sample into her blood stream quick, it might work.

"Kakashi." Sakura called, her throat tight as she kept her concentration on her chakra. "I need my bag."

It was beside her in a flash and she instructed Shun to get the vial from the inside pocket. They quickly administered it into the girl's arm and Sakura sighed in relief as it immediately coursed through her blood stream. It would fight the remaining poison and hold off any furthering and damaging symptoms. As Sakura pulled the ball of black liquid from the girl, she dropped it into a waiting test tube and stumbled back, her chakra settling back inside her own body. "I think I got most of it." The girl before her settled against the bed as the medicines began to sedate her.

Several of the nurses cheered and congratualted Sakura but she shook her head and waved them off. "I'm just glad we got to her as quick as we did. Any longer and she might not be so lucky. Why was she a target, anyway?"

One of the nurses at the IV drip cast a glance to Sakura and leaned closer to whisper. "She's the Raikage's niece. It was meant for him." Blinking, Sakura turned to glance at her partner behind her. He met her eyes just as the hospital door opened and a guard ordered everyone except Sakura and Kakashi out of the room.

Despite her protest, everyone hurried from the room and was ushered down the hallway, well away from them. Sakura opened her mouth to chastise the guard for getting rid of her team but was silenced by the daunting presence of the Raikage. His face was tired and so grief-stricken that Sakura stumbled back against the wall to let him pass. He stood at the foot of his niece's bed and gripped the metal frame so hard it creaked under the pressure.

"This was not meant to happen." He spoke quietly, never looking away from the girl.

Sakura stepped beside him and glanced at the sleeping figure. She was confident his niece would survive without any lasting complications. Her lungs felt fine, her heart was under a bit of stress but had calmed considerably by the time Sakura pulled the last of the poison. "She's going to be fine."

He said nothing and continued to stare at the girl, pain and anguish written across his face. from behind them, Kakashi stepped forward. "Do you know how this happened or anything that we could use to find whoever is behind all these attacks?"

The Raikage shook his head and pinched the bridge of his nose. "No. I was up reading when I heard Aiko scream. When I got to her, she was on the floor saying someone had stabbed her in the side. Shortly after that, she vomited and we rushed her here." Sakura frowned and moved to the side of the bed. She pulled at the blankets covering Aiko and lifted the girl's hospital gown up to her ribs. With quick fingers, she pulled at the girl's flesh until she spotted a tiny pinprick. A speck of dried blood rimmed the puncture mark and Sakura sat up, glancing to Kakashi. "It was a needle. Whoever's doing this must have access to syringes and the green house supplies. Do you know anyone who could have access to both of those?"

He scoffed darkly and shook his head. "That could be anyone of about two hundred people. Everyone has access to the green houses and this hospital employees at least a hundred staff."

Kakashi touched his chin with a small 'hm'. "Have you told anyone about the attack? Does anyone know all the details you've told us?"

"Only a handful of my most trusted guards. They had nothing to do with this, I know."

"Let's keep it that way. Don't mention the puncture mark, don't mention what she said. Have a guard in here at all times and anyone who comes in must sign their name." The Raikage nodded at Kakashi's words and ordered a guard to let the other's know their orders. From behind the curtain, Sakura rechecked all the machines and medicines to assure herself they were correct. The thought of this attacker being someone so close to the hospital made her skin crawl.

On a silver tray, the vial of poison sat. There was only a bit in the tube, about the side of a pea and Sakura held it up to the light. It was impossibly black and thick like syrup. It moved slow as she turned the test tube back and forth. She had seen something like this before when she had studied with Shizune. She had been researching cactus type plants and came across a particularly nasty bloom called the Midnight Poppy. There wasn't much of a description in the books she had read but it described its paste as highly poisonous and black.

But, typically they only grew in hot, dry places like Sunakagure. From beside her, she hadn't even noticed Kakashi step close to her until he put a hand against her arm. Blinking, she lowered the test tube and stared up at him. "Are you alright?"

"Mm. I need to take a trip to the green houses." She glanced to the guard who was standing as still as a statue beside the door. "Come get me, immediately, if her condition changes. Don't let anyone in this room without a guard to watch their every move." She turned and hurried into the bright lights of the hallway. The guards had did a good job of clearing everyone out but as they passed the employee break room, Sakura glanced at Shun sitting at a table with two other women. He looked up and met her eyes. He flashed a smile her way and she forced one in return. Everyone in that room felt like a suspect now and she couldn't trust any of them.

If this person had medical training and was a skilled herbalist, she could be in trouble. It was bad enough when all of this felt political, going after the village elders in an attempt to incite chaos. But now, finding this person was of utmost importance.

Once outside, the cold bit at the exposed skin on Sakura's body. She pulled her coat closed and glanced back at the man behind her. He followed behind her dutifully, hands stuffed deep in his coat pockets and head bent low to deflect the horrid wind. They reached the green houses just before the caretaker was locking up for the night. She let them inside and Sakura questioned her about any desert plants they might be growing. But, the little old woman denied planting or ever hearing about the Midnight Poppy. She apologized but Sakura reassured her and stepped back out into the cold evening air.

The sun slipped behind the western mountain peaks and shadows fell across the village in a matter of minutes. Rumors spread fast and most people were already inside for the night, taking extra precautions after the latest attack. Windows shut and doors locked at the sight of the two ninjas as they made their way back through the meandering bridges to the tiny little store they called home now.

Being so close to home, so close to being alone again, made Sakura's heart race like mad beneath her chest. She didn't glance back at Kakashi as they made their way up and over the last bridge. Twenty feet away from their solitude and she felt a bit dizzy. After the whirlwind of the day, she wondered if they could pick up where they had left off. She was exhausted, that was true. But with every step closer to their apartment, the more her desire spiked and her adrenaline kicked in. By the time they were climbing the stairs, her fingers were shaking against the hand rail.

She reached the door first and twisted the knob. It stopped halfway and she blinked down at it, realized in her haste earlier that she had forgotten her key. "I got it." Kakashi said quietly, reaching over to slip the key into the lock. It turned effortlessly and Sakura could only stare as he pushed the door open and stood back for her to walk in. This was it.


	10. Chapter Ten

.

.

What have I become?

I'm a fucking monster

When all I wanted was something beautiful

.

.

Silence filled every inch of the room around them and Sakura's heart beat sounded as loud as a pounding drum beneath her chest. She was beyond exhausted but adrenaline coursed through her veins, heightening her senses. Inhaling a deep breath, she was aware of his scent immediately. It was as if he were fresh from the shower again and immediately, images of him dripping and half naked filled her mind. Sakura opened her eyes and bit down on her lower lip hard enough to taste the metallic flavor of blood.

Kakashi stood very still in front of the bedroom door, his eyes clouded with hunger as he watched her. He looked very much like a predator, focused only on his prey as he moved closer to her. The back of Sakura's legs hit the desk and she gripped the edge to keep herself steady. In two strides, he was before her but kept his hands to himself.

For several seconds they hesitated, their chests pressing together with every shaking breath they took. Her body responded to his closeness in an instant, the familiar ache building between her legs was so strong she could almost cry. After several seconds, Kakashi slid his hands under Sakura's jacket and slipped it over her shoulders. It hit the floor at her feet and she kicked it toward the bed, out of their way.

Agonizingly slow, Kakashi let his fingers graze across the skin of Sakura's shoulders and neck, inching their way up to cradle her jaw. A sigh shuddered from her lips a second before he lifted her face toward his. This kiss was different than all the others, Sakura knew as soon as their mouths touched. Maybe it was how different she felt about the situation, or how she felt about him, but Sakura could taste a change between them. It was as if they had been teetering on the edge of the mountain side and this kiss sent them over the edge. There was no going back to the way they were before.

Kakashi's hand left her face briefly to pull the slip of fabric away from his face and she felt her head swim at the touch of his lips. Sakura wondered if the dizziness that accompanied his kiss would ever fade. She took the hem of his shirt in her hands and lifted it over his head, tossing it to the floor. She had hoped she could take a moment just to admire his body, but he captured her mouth once more.

Sakura spread her fingers over the muscles stretched over his ribs and down his sides, wishing she could taste every dip they made under his flesh. Once she reached the waist of his pants she hesitated, not as courageous as she had been that night in the lab. She wasn't afraid but she was very intimidated. It wasn't lost on her how big and hard he felt through his pants the few times she had been against him.

She didn't have time to worry, however. Kakashi inched the fabric of her shirt up her torso and Sakura could feel her pulse quicken. She hadn't been naked in front of him before and the thought sent tiny jolts of electricity racing over her skin. She let him pull her shirt off before Sakura blinked up at him, surprised to see him free from his mask.

She had been so consumed with kissing him and feeling his muscles that she hadn't realized his face was bared to her. Before he could lean in to kiss her again, she took his face in her hands and studied him. There was a faint tan line over the bridge of his nose and it made her smile. With her thumb, she traced over the freckle below his lips and pressed a small kiss to it, leading a trail to his neck. Gods, he smelled amazing. Being so close to his skin was almost intoxicating, and her body felt warm and tingly as if she were already tipsy off him.

Sakura reached behind her and quickly unhooked her bra. She let her head fall back as Kakashi gave a small groan against her throat. His palm spread over her breast and she sucked in a sharp breath at the sensation. With one hand around her back, he kissed his way down to her nipple, taking it all in her mouth. The feel of his tongue swirling over the sensitive nub nearly made her cry out. She gripped a handful of hair at the back of his neck as a tremble rolled through her body.

Kakashi nipped at the flesh of her breast as his hands splayed over the tops of her thighs. "Do you like these pants?" He asked, his mouth barely leaving her flesh. Confused, Sakura's brow furrowed but she shook her head. "Good." He murmured before he grabbed the fabric of her leggings and popped the seam all the way up.

Sakura gasped at the sudden feel of cold air against her thighs but before she could cover herself with her hands, he took her by the wrists and stopped her. Kakashi lowered himself onto his knees in front of her, his eyes never leaving hers and hooked a finger around the edge of her panties. He pulled them aside and Sakura felt light headed as she lowered herself back onto the desk. Papers scattered to the floor and she watched as the rack of empty test tubes fell onto its side, sending the glass rolling toward the window. But it all melted into a world of black as Kakashi pressed his tongue against her.

Her chest rose and fell with every shaking breath she pulled in and she gripped the edge of the desk to reassure herself she wasn't floating away. His tongue slid up through her folds and back down, pausing briefly at her clit. Sakura cried out as he sucked gently on the bud. She had never felt anything as good as this, had never felt pleasure flood through her like a tidal wave and she feared she might drown in it. She squeezed her eyes shut as he held her thighs tightly, keeping them wide apart as he continued the slow teasing. He moaned softly against her and swirled his tongue over her, moving just a bit faster now. Sakura grabbed a fistful of her hair as her back arched up off the desk, her hips shuddering against his mouth. She cried out as she came, panting hard and loud as wave after wave rolled through her body.

Sakura clamped her thighs together as he stood, unable to fathom how she was still coming. She had never had an orgasm that intense and a tiny voice in the back of her mind reminded her that he had warned her she might not be able to handle it. She couldn't help the small laugh that bubbled into her throat but promptly silenced herself as Kakashi lifted her completely from the desk.

Gasping, Sakura gripped his shoulders as he carried her back to his bed. Despite the orgasm that was still making its way through her insides, she felt her body respond instantly to the thought of what was to come next. He laid her back against the pillows before he began to unbuckle the belt around his hips. She watched, her mouth suddenly dry at the sight of him, as if she had been wandering the desert and he was the only source of water for miles. As he pulled at the button of his pants, she wiggled out of her torn leggings, their eyes locked onto one another's. She stood up to her knees and dipped her hand beneath the fabric of his pants, gripping the base of his cock. She couldn't help the small hitch in her breath at the feel of his width and for a second she wondered if he would be able to fit. Swallowing, Sakura guided him down onto the bed, knowing it would be far easier if she were on top and in control.

Kakashi laid back against the bed and swore under his breath as she straddled his hips, hesitating above him. Hearing him curse turned Sakura on more than she cared to admit and she wanted to hear it again. She lowered herself onto his cock, her breath heavy as she tried to fit him inside her. She had never felt this filled before and it was several seconds before she could move. Slowly, she began to rock her hips against him, the feel of him sliding in and out of her nearly driving her to the edge all over again.

His hands gripped her hips and guided her back and forth, letting her get used to the rhythm before he moved faster. Sweat dripped from her temple, her lips pursed in concentration and Sakura couldn't believe that she felt as if she could come again. Kakashi sat up, taking her by surprise. He wrapped his arms around her and pressed her tightly against him. He kissed the flesh of her collar bone, his breath hot and fast against her damp skin. Sakura laid her cheek against his hair as he thrust up into her, harder and faster with each move. "Fuck." He whispered against her breast and she felt her body tense, the growing intensity inside her begging to be released. She moved faster against him, panting and moaning louder than she had before. In seconds, she was coming again. Throwing her head back, Sakura gasped and gripped his shoulders so hard she was afraid her fingernails would break skin.

Her orgasm triggered his own and a moment later, he was coming. Kakashi groaned against her throat, his thrusts slowing until they were still against each other, breathless and sticky with sweat. Exhaustion washed over Sakura as they pulled away from each other and settled back onto the pillows. Kakashi pulled her against him and brushed her hair away from her temple before pressing a small kiss to her forehead. It was such a small gesture but one of the most intimate moments of Sakura's life. She blinked up at him as he closed his eyes, his hair tousled from her laying against him. He seemed peaceful, but Sakura could tell he had a million questions running through her mind like she did.

The longer she laid there, staring at him, the bigger the change that her guilt would creep into her mind like a fog. She closed her eyes and hoped she could sleep through the part where she would feel awful, hoped she could hold onto this feeling for just a bit longer...

Sakura woke with a jolt, her eyes snapping open to a near pitch black room. The could see a little bit of light from the street lamp peeking through the window blinds and it was enough for her to see the mess they had left on the floor. She glanced behind her where Kakashi still slept, his arm draped comfortably over her hip. Carefully, Sakura slipped out from beneath his grasp and bit her lip as he rolled toward the window. She waited several seconds but when he didn't wake up, she tiptoed carefully to gather some clothes and hurried to the bathroom. She slid the door closed behind her and turned to the sink.

Her reflection caught her off guard and she stared at the messy, pink strands of her hair as she clutched her clothes to her chest. She was almost surprised she still looked the same but that was silly. One affair wouldn't turn her into a three headed monster, even though that's how she felt. 'You're a bad person', the voice made her flinch. It sounded oddly similar to her mother.

Sakura forced herself to look away from the mirror and she sat down on the toilet. She pressed a hand to her belly and closed her eyes, forcing her chakra to gather where her hand rest. She pushed it like a broom along her insides and forced anything foreign out of her body. It was something she had done numerous times for women at the hospital. Women who claimed they had been taken advantage of, women who said their husbands never knew how to take no for an answer, they were all looking at Sakura in her mind now. She was ashamed that she had often snickered with the other nurses, hadn't stood up for them as they were whispered about and laughed at. 'Some women just have no self control', she could hear one of the older nurses cluck her tongue at her.

Even with Kyo, Sakura made sure he used protection and she was very careful not to have sex when she was ovulating. God, she hadn't even let her fiance come inside her yet. The thought made her nearly sick to her stomach and she moaned, dropping her head into her hands. The afterglow of her sex with Kakashi had disappeared now, leaving the horrible taste of bile in the back of her throat.

Sakure wiped herself and flushed the toilet before dressing quickly in her pajamas. This time, she avoided the mirror, flicked the light off and stepped back into the bedrooom. She risked a glance to the bed but he was still sleeping soundly. The grey sheet was draped over his waist, but she could still see the curve of his muscles stretched across his back and down below the sheets in the faint light. In a flash, she could see him standing before her, then between her legs and finally her lowering herself onto him like a movie in her mind.

Quickly, she shook it from her head and stooped to pick up the various clothes that were strewn about. She folded his shirt, bringing it to her nose to briefly inhale his scent. She didn't want to forget it. Next, she straightened the desk, dropping the test tubes back into the rack one at a time. She grabbed a few folders and sorted the papers, stacking them neatly by the window before turning to the ones that had fell to the floor. Sakura knelt to the floor and reached under the desk where a folder was laying open. Frowning, she grabbed it and held it up to the light.

On the tab was written 'Employee Files' and had the hospital's symbol on the front. Sakura sat back on her feet and opened the folder. Inside were numerous pages, all with information on the employees of the hospital. How had she never seen this before?

She thumbed through a few of them, reading over mundane duties and background information on each person. Sakura flipped one of them over and stared down at Shun's black and white picture staring up at her. It was the same one on his badge which was odd since the other pictures seemed to all have been different. Her eyes drifted down to his sparse information. He was twenty-seven, had become a citizen of Kumagakure three years ago and had immediately began working for the hospital. The page ended after only two sentences.

She flipped the page over but there was nothing else to read. Had one of his pages went missing? The other employees had several paragraphs, detailing family, previous jobs, addresses. It was so odd how his just...ended.

Sakura glanced around and saw a piece of white sticking out from under the corner of Kakashi's bed. Quickly, she glanced over at him. He was still sound asleep and her heart ached as she watched him. It seemed strange to her how the memories of them earlier caused such a whirlwind of emotion in side of her. She was happy and disgusted, aroused and torn apart all at the same time. Tears stung her eyes and she quickly wiped them away. God, she was a monster.

She had cheated on her fiance, had used one of her closest and oldest friends, and had probably ruined any chance at happiness in her life. Her chest felt like someone were standing on it, stomping down on her heart and she knew she deserved to feel this way. She sucked in a breath but it was difficult through the sobs that she couldn't hold back. The folder fell to the floor and she covered her face with her hands.

From on top of the bed, Kakashi rolled onto his back and sat up on his elbows. Quickly, Sakura wiped at her face and dried her cheeks with the sleeve of her top. She scooped the files back into the folder and reached for the stray piece of paper under the bed. "Sakura?"

"Mm?" She could barely make a sound, afraid that if she opened her mouth all that would come out would be more sobbing. With the bed blocking her from him, she made sure all traces of tears were gone from her face before standing to face the desk. "What are you doing?"

"Uhm..." She flipped the page over and stared at the top sentence, her blood nearly freezing in her veins. It was the next page of Shun's file. Previous citizenship: Sunagakure. Her mind raced as she dropped the folder and spun, reaching for the medical bag that she had discarded by the door hours before. She unzipped it quickly, ignoring the sound of Kakashi dressing behind her. She refused to look back, no matter how much she wanted to. Finally, her fingers encircled the test tube filled with the thick, black muck she had pulled from Aiko.

Midnight Poppy only grew in desert climates. Could Shun have something to do with this? He had been so nice, so welcoming and eager to help as soon as they had arrived. She turned toward him now. He was dressed in his pants from earlier, but not much else. Shirtless and with his face still exposed, Kakashi took the file from a blushing Sakura. It was so bizarre to see all of him. She cleared her throat and stood on her tip toes to point at the second page. "He's from Suna...the same place this poison grows. It's not enough to arrest him, but I think it's enough to inform the Raikage about."

Kakashi nodded and turned back to finish getting dressed. He slipped his mask back into place and nodded toward the door. "We need to be discreet. If he even suspects that we're onto him, he may try to flee."

"I agree. Which is why I think you should be the one to inform the Raikage. I need to get back to the hospital. If he's there, I can try to keep him busy with helping me."

Kakashi paused, his coat halfway up his arms as he stared at her with an eyebrow raised. "Are you sure?"

"Yes. I don't think he'll risk an attack. The guards are out in full force and he knows it." Sakura slipped her socks on and ducked to search under the bed for her boots. As she stood empty handed, Kakashi stepped up to her. She gave a small start and stumbled back, blinking up at him. He took her face in his hands, tracing a line across her jaw with his thumb. "Be careful." He said, his eyes pleading with hers. Swallowing, Sakura nodded.

"I will."

With a quick kiss to her forehead, he turned and made his way out of their bedroom, leaving Sakura standing in her pajamas and socks. She touched her jaw and shook herself from the daze he had left her in. She had to find her shoes. Kneeling, Sakura pulled back the blankets on her bed and clucked her tongue. How had they ended up all the way on the bed? She grabbed them quickly but the sound of the doorknob rattling made her whirl around. Had Kakashi changed his mind about splitting up?

The door slowly swung open on creaking hinges and Sakura felt the blood rush from her face. Standing in the shadows of the hallway was the same dark figure she had faced in the lab. Instantly, Sakura's body tensed and she gathered her chakra into her fists. She wasn't going to let Shun get the best of her this time. But, before she could lunge toward the figure, a pair of gloved hands clamped over her mouth. She stared with wide eyes as a needle glinted in the light. It swooped down but she spun toward the bed, nearly tripping on the shoes she had dropped to the floor.

The window behind the desk had been opened just enough for someone to slip through. How had she not heard it? The shadow clone advanced onto her, dodged a kick and grabbed her around the thigh as the other figure pulled his hood back. It was Shun. Sakura growled and channeled her chakra into her fist, ready to send all of her power smashing into his face. Instead, she felt a tiny prick on her thigh.

Gasping, she stumbled away from the shadow clone as he pressed the plunger down on the syringe. Whatever poison he had injected her with burned immediately. She pressed her hands to her thigh and tried to force her energy to the spot...but there was nothing. She had no chakra. "Fascinating, isn't it?" Shun laughed, catching her under the arms as she staggered. "I've been perfecting it since you got here." He brushed her hair from her face and Sakura felt her head swim. Her vision blurred and she could see black static buzzing through the room.

"It's affects are immediate and I'm afraid by the time it wears off, you and your boyfriend will be dead." Shun snapped his fingers and the shadow clone hooked its arms under Sakura's legs, lifting her from the floor. She could feel herself being taken from the bedroom but could see nothing but black. From behind her, Shun chuckled to himself. "One down. One to go."

AN- Oh, you're such a fool Sakura.


	11. Chapter Eleven

Chapter Eleven

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Well, Jesus Christ, I'm alone again

So what did you do those three days you were dead?

'cause this problem's gonna last more than the weekend

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The first thing Sakura noticed when she came to was the wind howling violently outside. She blinked in the darkness and sat up, her muscles aching and sore as she stretched and popped her neck. She couldn't see a thing but could definitely hear the onslaught of the wind. It sounded louder and stronger than anything she had experienced in Kumogakura. Groaning, she took a few stumbling steps through the dark but stopped short when the chain around her ankle pulled tight. Sakura hit the floor hard, wincing from the pain that shot through her left leg. She blinked a few times in the darkness and after a few minutes she was able to focus on a bit of light slipping in under a door and a window beside it. It wasn't much, but she was able to look down at herself.

Her legs were bare, with just her cotton panties she had put on after she and Kakashi had...With a gasp, she whirled around and searched beside her with an out stretched hand for anyone else who might have been caught off guard by Shun. Her hands felt nothing but the dirty ground. She was alone, which meant either Kakashi was still free or was already dead. Sakura swallowed hard and shook her aching head. No... he wasn't dead. Shun was sneaky but he wasn't that good.

As she gathered her thoughts, sitting on the filthy planks of wood on the floor, a gust of wind hit the side of the building so hard and sudden the rusting hinges of the door snapped free and sunlight streamed in. Sakura shielded her face with her arm, wincing as her headache increased from the light. She shivered against the cold that poured in and swirled around her before peeking out the door. It looked as if it were morning, perhaps only an hour or so after sunrise. Dust and snow swirled along the mountainside outside the door and blew through the room around her.

Sakura looked around her surroundings now. There was a table pushed along the opposite wall with a heavy, extra chain laying across it, more than likely meant for Kakashi. Goddamn it. With a grunt, she stood on her shaking legs and pulled at the chain around her foot. The metal band dug into her skin, the flakes of rust slicing into the bone on her ankle. Wincing, Sakura gave up trying to pull her foot free and focused on pulling the entire chain from the wall. Her chakra hadn't regenerated from the concoction Shun had injected into her and she tried to push the fear that it would last forever back in her mind. The last thing she needed right now was to panic. She refused to even think about why her pants were missing.

Shun was already going to die by her hands; if he had touched her or violated her, well...she would just have to enjoy his death a little bit more. Sakura wrapped her arms around the chain and pulled as hard as she could. Her fingers trembled against the metal and she screamed as she pulled, but it was no use. It didn't budge an inch. Frustrated, she turned to the table and spied a pipe laying against the wall under it. She couldn't reach it with her ankle. shackled. Quickly, she pulled her shirt over her head and tied a knot in the fabric. She lowered herself onto her stomach and tossed the shirt toward the table, stretching as far as she could. She missed the pipe by only an inch. Frustrated, she laid her forehead against the dusty floor and screamed against the wood planks.

Is this what she deserved? She had done so much wrong in the past few weeks, was this the universe's way of punishing her for being such a bad person? Curling her fists around the fabric of her shirt, Sakura shook her head against the ground. No. This wasn't punishment. This was bullshit. She let her guard down and let that bastard sneak up on her. If she had to be punished it would be because she hadn't expected Shun to attack. She had let her lust and desire for Kakashi cloud her judgment. It wouldn't happen again. Sniffing, she sat back up on her elbows and glared at the pipe across from her.

She tossed the shirt again and this time managed to roll it just a bit closer. The chain on her ankle cut deep as she stretched as far as she could. Grinding her teeth, she tossed her shirt once more and gasped as the fabric covered the pipe. She carefully pulled it closer, the knot catching on the rusted metal. It rolled into her grasp and she hurried back to the wall. She slipped the pipe into the loop that held the chain and kicked as hard as she could twice with her good foot. The loop popped with a clang and she pulled the chain out and gathered it around her. She was free, even if she would have to lug her shackles around with her.

Sakura quickly pulled her shirt back on and dusted the dirt off of her skin. She wrapped the loose end of the chain around her wrist and limped her way toward the door. The cliff side dropped straight down outside the shack and Sakura grabbed the door frame to steady herself. They had to be deep in the mountains, miles up from the village. She gulped and slid out onto the path that was only a couple of feet wide. Wind ripped her hair around her head and she wished she had something to pull it back with. Slowly, she inched her way along the path, cursing the shackle around her ankle. Blood courses down the length of her foot and squished between her toes, staining the snow that littered the trail.

On the bright side, she could feel the warmth of chakra sprouting back to life inside her. She pulled at it but it didn't want to budge. It was completely exhausted as if she had used every bit of energy stored inside her. Sakura gave up trying to gather the chakra and instead focused on how good it was going to feel to choke the life out of Shun with her bare hands. Chakra or not, she was confident she could bring him down.

The shack she had escaped from disappeared from her view as she circled around, following the trail up over a few bluffs. Rocks crumbled under her steps and bounced down the mountain side. She couldn't even follow them down. The clouds circling below her made it feel as if she would never get back down. She was miles above the earth now. Gulping, she found her footing and climbed upward. She reached a small plateau and managed to roll onto her back in the snow that had gathered on the flat ground, breathless. Her fingers and toes ached and her head still pounded from the drug's lasting affects on her body. She crawled across the flat surface until she was against the mountain, safe from the edge of the cliff and inspected her ankle.

Wincing, she pulled at the metal band around her leg. Blood continued to drip from the cuts and tears and she could almost see the bone on the inside of her ankle. "Fuck." She cursed through her tears.

"Saaakuuuraaaa..." A voice echoed around the mountain, carried by the wind that whipped around her. Gasping, she rose to her feet and searched the mountains across from her for any sign of Shun. Her blood ran cold as her heart pounded hard against her chest. Where was that bastard? He couldn't be too far behind her. She shivered to think about him finding her back in that shack. What had he planned for her?

Sakura's eyes widened on the spatters of blood she had trailed behind her in the snow. It wouldn't be long until he found her. She gathered a handful of snow in her hands and scrubbed at her wounds, washing her skin the best she could. It didn't help much, but it would have to do.

Standing, she hurried to the cliffs edge and peeked over. There was no sign of him on the trail that lead from the shack. He probably knew his way around the mountains well. She had to find a way back to the village, or close enough that she could scream for help. Twisting the chain back around her wrist, she took to the rocks again and traversed around and around until she could find an area to rest.

"Saaakuuuraaaaa!"

She gasped and looked above her where his voice came from. Shun sat on a small over hang, a few feet above her, shaking his head down at her. "Where are you going? You can't make it out of here."

He laughed and leapt down beside her, snatching her around the neck with his fist. She blocked him with an elbow and spun out of his grasp. Her foot slipped off the edge of the cliff and Sakura gasped as she felt herself tumbling down. She grabbed at the rocks but she was half way off the cliff side before she could find a grip. She hit the plateau she had came to earlier hard, her ribs cracking beneath her weight. Gasping for air, she barely had time to roll out of the way before Shun's foot stomped down onto her head.

As she scrambled back on her hands, Shun closed the distance between them in two steps. He grabbed her around the neck, lifted her from the snow and slammed her back against the rocks. Pain shot through her side and the back of her head as he held her there. "Did you think you were going to get away?" He threw his head back and laughed. It echoed around them, joining in the howl of the wind, making Sakura wince. She dug her fingernails into the flesh of his wrist but he didn't seem to even notice. Her pushed against her throat as he glared down at her. "No one is coming for you, especially that boyfriend of yours. He's half way back to Konoha now, thinking I took you down the mountain to kill you. What a moron."

Sakura ground her teeth together so hard she feared they would shatter. It was getting hard to breath with his palm against her throat. The edges of her vision twinkled black as she gasped for air. "No one is saving you today, Sakura. You have no chakra, you have no boyfriend savior, and you are going to die."

He clutched her neck and spun, throwing her across the plateau. She slid along the ground but managed to stop herself from sliding over the edge. She scrambled back to her feet, coughing and gasping for breath. Shun chuckled at her efforts and followed her as she retreated on shaking legs as far from him as she could get. He shook his head and popped his knuckles and Sakura took the opportunity to wrap her chain tightly around her fist. She didn't need chakra to break his nose with metal. She backed into the rock behind her and waited. "You know, I've got to hand it to you. You're tougher than I thought. Though you are utterly useless, you've got-"

She took a step and slammed her fist into his face, grinning at the crunch of bones that echoed loudly in her ears. He grabbed his face and stumbled back. "You fucking bitch!" He screamed, spitting blood along the ground. As his guard faltered, Sakura rushed him. She ran and grabbed him around his middle, slamming him back onto the ground. On top of him, she clamped her thighs around his waist, grabbed his hair in two fistfuls and slammed his head back into the ground. He twisted, throwing her off. He struggled to his feet, off balance from the blow to his head and he stumbled side to side. "I'm going to kill you!" He roared, but Sakura was already scaling the mountain side.

She had to put distance between them and she doubted he would be capable of climbing fast with his head swimming so hard. Her toes cracked and bled, her fingernails broke past the quick but she moved as fast as she could up the mountain.

The sun broke from behind a cloud as she swung her leg up onto a ledge and rolled onto her back. Her chest ached and she was pretty sure at least two ribs were broken on her right side. She stared up at the wisps of clouds racing across the sky and could feel a tear roll down her temple. Exhaustion spread through her body but she forced it back, rolling onto her side with a groan. Shun hadn't followed her...yet.

Sakura stumbled along the mountain top and wished she knew which way the village was. It seemed as if the mountains stretched in every direction, with no breaks between.

She whirled around toward the west and did the only thing she could think of. She leaned her head back, cupped her hands around her mouth and screamed for Kakashi. She knew he wouldn't hear it over the wind, but if there was a tiny chance, she had to take it. After a minute of screaming his name into the wind, Sakura felt a hand grip her elbow, spinning her. Shun grabbed the back of her head and slammed his forehead down onto her nose.

Black filled her vision as pain exploded through her face. He hadn't broke her nose but she could feel the warmth of blood rush down her lips and chin. "I told you, stupid girl! He." A fist slammed into her stomach and she doubled over, vomit rising into her throat. "Isn't." Shun pulled her by her hair toward the cliffs edge and Sakura knew he meant to throw her off. "Coming!"

A growl sounded deep and low in her throat, and the further up it went, the louder it became. She screamed as she dug her heels into the ground to stop him and brought her fist up under his chin. With the chain still wrapped around her fingers, she slammed it into his jaw. His teeth shattered with a gut wrenching sound that was music to her ears. With a grunt, he released her and fell onto his ass on the ground. A gash the length of her finger ran along the underside of his chin but she didn't care. Sakura grabbed the fabric of his shirt with one hand to hold him steady as she slammed her fist back into his face. He made no sound as he slipped into unconsciousness but she didn't care. She punched again and again until his face because unrecognizable. Her fingers cracked beneath the chain and pain spread up her hand.

Hot tears stained her cheeks and she cursed herself for crying. There was no stopping it now as she slid off of Shun's body. She rolled onto her back in the snow and gulped in lungfuls of air. Every breath sent a sharp, agonizing stab through her side. She shook the chain from her hand and stared at her dislocated middle finger before pressing it against her stomach. Biting her lip, she popped it back into place and tried to wriggle it. It was definitely broken in a few places.

From beside her, Shun groaned and she scrambled back as fast as she could. He was still alive? His face looked like a purple grape that had been stepped on. He laid still along the ground and Sakura breathed a sigh. She raked her good hand through her matted, dirty hair. She had to get back to the village but her body protested every movement she tried to make. Maybe a few minutes of rest was what she needed.

She let her eyes close for a brief second but it was all the bastard needed. Shun lunged off the ground at Sakura just as she opened her eyes wide. He had a rock in his grip, raised high above his head, ready to smash into Sakura's head. He yelled something but the blood in his throat distorted his words.

With the last bit of energy she could gather, Sakura covered her face with her arms and waited for the blow that would surely knock her unconscious or worse. But it never came. Instead, she could hear Shun sucking in gasps of air. The rock in his hand fell to the ground and Sakura peeked out from behind her arms, her eyes going straight for the gaping hole in Shun's chest. He stumbled and stared down at the bright ball of lightning that had ripped through his body from the back before slumping to his knees and finally hitting the ground, dead.

Sakura was on her feet in seconds, the wind ripping her hair around her as she stared at Kakashi in disbelief. He had heard her. Several ninja were rushing over the mountains behind him but she ignored them as they gathered around Shun's body. Limping, she made her way around the group, wanting nothing more than to pull him into her arms. Kakashi stepped to her and held her at arms length, his eyes hard as he looked her over. He cupped her bloodied face and smoothed a hand over her hair. She could see his mouth moving behind his mask, but could hear nothing but the rush of the wind in her ears. He cast a glance to the men behind her before kneeling to the ground. He grabbed the chain around her ankle and snapped it in two like it were nothing but a piece of grass. It felt good to finally be rid of the extra weight.

"I broke my finger." She muttered as Kakashi stood to his full height. Someone handed him their jacket and a long robe that dragged the ground as it was wrapped around her shoulders. She recognized it as the Raikage's. When had he gotten there?

She was thankful for the warmth and the feel of Kakashi's arms wrapped around her. He scooped her up with one hand behind her knees and the other around her back and said something to the group behind her before hurrying back down the mountains. Being so close to him was the best feeling. She would gladly endure a 1000 days like this if it meant she could end it in Kakashi's arms. She laid her head against his shoulder and watched him as he kept his eyes on the path back to the village. His hair whipped around his head and Sakura couldn't help wrapping her finger around a tiny strand at the back of his neck.

Her throat clenched around her tears as she realized it was all over. The mission, their affair, this feeling...it was all over and tomorrow they would go back to Konoha where she had to pretend it never happened. The wind died down the closer they got to the village and Sakura clamped her teeth around her tongue. She was feeling very groggy and knew if she didn't stop herself, she would say something stupid like usual. But god, she had so much to say to him.

How would she even tell him? "Kakashi." She whispered, nuzzling her cheek against his neck.

"Yes?"

"I-" The words stuck like glue in her mouth and the sting of tears made her suddenly angry. God, why couldn't she say it? She loved him but it felt so stupid. He didn't love her in the same way. This was nothing more than a mission to him where he happened to get laid. He more than likely had several missions like this under his belt.

As the tears spilled hot down her cheeks, she buried her face against him and took in a shaking, deep breath. "I'm tired."

"I know. We're almost there. Just a bit more."

She sighed. She was tired, that was for sure. But she didn't mean it like that. She was tired of fighting her feelings, tired of hiding them. Tomorrow, her life would return to the way it was and she would have to think about a wedding, her future, her husband. Could she go back to the way things were? It seemed so far away now. But, it was how it had to be. To go back after three weeks and suddenly let everyone down, to have to tell so many people that it was over...she couldn't. She had made a commitment and would never be able to live with herself if she made such a selfish decision. As much as it killed her to think about it, as much as her heart fought against it, she knew what she had to do...

Sakura woke with a gasp, her hands grabbing at the oxygen tube that stretched from her nose to the tank on the wall behind her. She ripped it away from her face and clutched her aching ribs. They had healed but were still bruised. She would have to be careful with them for a few days.

Someone had washed the dried blood off of her face off as well. She touched her lips before brushing her fingers through her damp hair. She couldn't remember bathing, but felt so much better now that she was free from all the dirt and grime. It was dark outside the hospital and she wondered how long she had been there. It seemed a bit unnecessary. Her wounds were minor, and she had needed sleep more than anything.

"Sakura." She recognized the voice immediately and felt her body tingle in response. The corner of the bed shifted and she looked through the darkness as Kakashi reached out and pushed a strand of hair behind her ear. "How are you feeling?"

"I'm fine. I don't need to be in a hospital." She frowned and looked down at the paper thin gown they had put on her. She had seen so many of them in her time as a medic nin, it felt strange to be in one.

"They thought it was best if you were asleep for the examination."

Oh. He must have mentioned the fact that she had been found wearing nothing but her panties and pajama top. She felt sick to her stomach all of a sudden and she wasn't sure she wanted to know the answer. If Shun had touched her or...

She had to fight the urge to vomit and pulled at the sheets wrapped around her waist. "D-did he..."

No." Kakashi whispered, staring darkly into the room. He sounded relieved but she could tell there was still some anger inside him. An image of him standing behind Shun, his chidori still chirping loudly, flashed through her mind and she swallowed. She had seen him a hundred times in battle, had fought beside him since she was 12, but she had never seen him look the way he had on that mountain. And when his eyes turned to her, she felt a rush of warmth flood through her body. It was the same feeling she used to get from returning back to Konoha after a mission. She was home. But, Kakashi wasn't hers. He would never be hers and she had to realize that. Tomorrow they would turn back to Konoha and whatever they had shared would disappear.

Sakura wiped a hand across her face and let her shoulders slump against the pillows behind her. "Listen-"

"I think I know what you're going to say. And I agree. It's for the best for us to leave what happened here behind us." His words cut her like a knife and hurt worse than any pain Shun had inflicted on her. Flinching, Sakura was thankful for the darkness of the room to hide the hurt she could feel etching itself across her face. She was suddenly glad she hadn't told him she loved him. Broken bones and bruises she could heal from, but she wasn't sure she could handle a broken heart right now.

Sniffing, she pulled her legs out from under the sheets and stepped off the bed. She pulled at the IV needle embedded into the top of her hand, wincing at the sensation. "What are you doing?" Kakashi asked, stepping away from the bed.

Sakura stepped past him and managed to find her way to the light switch beside the door. She ignored him as a dim light lit the room. A bag of clothes sat along the table against the wall and she snatched a pair of pants. "I'm getting dressed."

"You need rest."

"No." She said through clenched teeth, stepping into her leggings. "I need to go home."

"Are you upset about what I said?" He followed her as she paced back to the bed, searching for her bra that was missing from the bag. Rolling her eyes, she turned her back to him and wrenched the hospital gown over her head. Screw the bra. She wanted to get out of here, fast. Not because she was angry at him, but because she was faced with the reality that he didn't feel the same. She had given him so much, sacrificed her future for one night with him and it meant nothing. No. It meant everything to her but obviously she was just another notch on his belt.

"No. It's exactly what I needed to hear. We fucked and we got it out of our system. Now I can focus on something more important." Sakura tried to keep her voice flippant, but it was hard when her heart wanted nothing more than to cry. She tugged her shirt down and turned to him. A flash of surprised hurt passed over his face but he was quick to hide it. His eyes returned to normal, half-lidded and lazy like he didn't have a care in the world. "Fine. I'll get my things."

"Good."

She flinched as he hurried from the room and let the door slam behind him. Once she was sure he wouldn't be able to hear her, she choked back a sob and pressed her palm to her mouth. She put her forehead against the wall and cried harder than she had in a very long time. Sobs racked her body and she shook so hard, she had to lower herself to the floor to keep from falling over. Her face ached and her eyes felt swollen and red. But, it was best to get it all out now. She wouldn't have much of an opportunity to mourn their affair once she was back home and she would rather be damned than let Kakashi see how badly she hurt. For several long minutes, she sat in the floor, holding her head in her head as the flow of tears slowed.

She used her shirt tail to dry her eyes before moving about the room to gather the rest of her things. All the clothes she had brought had been destroyed, all of her notes were useless now, and she was sure he would grab her medic bag from their room. Everything she would be taking with her was in her arms and it wasn't much. She stared down into the backpack, feeling as if she had shed part of herself to leave behind. With a sigh, she wondered if he would be waiting at the gates of the village for her. She didn't figure he would come back to get her.

The hallways of the hospital were eerily empty and quiet. Just a few days ago, there had been such an uproar about the attack on the Raikage's niece. She had never seen so many people jammed into a space so small. But now, it was deserted. Aiko would recover. There wasn't much of a story to that.

Sakura hugged her arms around herself and stepped out into the night. It was cold, but she welcomed the feeling around her. She made her way to the village gates and could see Kakashi waiting, signing them out at the guard shack. He had her medic bag around his shoulder, just as she had predicted and it made her chest feel tight all over again. She hoped her face didn't look as puffy as it felt. Her eyes still ached from crying so hard.

As she stepped up to him, he held her bag out to her without looking up from the clipboard. He signed her name rather sloppily, nodded to the two guards and headed off into the night without a backward glance. Sakura shouldered her bag and hesitated. She took a deep breath, closed her eyes, and followed him into the darkness.

AN- I'm posting two chapters tonight because the next one is the ending :O


	12. Chapter Twelve

Chapter Twelve

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Want forgiveness

Getting weaker

I'm addicted to the fever

Let go, I'm ready for it

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They had decided not to stop for the night on the way back to Konoha. Well, Kakashi had made the decision without consulting her and Sakura was too exhausted to protest. She had followed him down the trail through the mountains, taking extra care not to slip or bump into him. She could practically feel the anger pouring off of him.

She didn't know why he was so angry. She was the one he dumped without a care in the world, she was the one who had sacrificed everything to be with him. If anyone should be angry, it was her.

But, she wasn't. She stared at his back the entire way, wishing she could gather the courage to reach out and touch him. She stared at the spot on the back of his head where her finger had twirled around his hair as he carried her through the mountains. It had been so soft and if she had known it would have been the last time she could have felt it, she would have appreciated it more. But, what did she expect? It wasn't like they were going to kiss one last time, touch each other one last time...all she had were the memories now.

It made her sick to her stomach and with every step closer to home, she couldn't shake the feeling of unease. How could he not feel this between them? Could he really be so intimate with someone else and have it mean nothing? Maybe he had been right all along. She hadn't been able to handle it. He had showed her something so amazing and so intimate and it changed her. She was different and she couldn't handle it.

Tears stung her eyes and she drew in a slow, trembling breath, hoping he couldn't hear her struggling. Panic was quickly rising through her like a flood and she clung to any thought that could hold her head above the black waters of fear. She just needed to get home. She needed her normalcy again. A few days in Kyo's apartment, getting back into the routine of her life and she would be fine.

God, why didn't she believe that?

She felt her throat clench, blocking her breath and for a second, true panic struck Sakura. She stopped her trek behind Kakashi and grabbed hold of a tree to steady herself. "Kakashi." His name was out of her mouth before she could stop it.

He slowed to a stop and turned, his face full of annoyance at first. But, at the sight of her clutching onto a tree, he hurried back up to her, searching her eyes. "Are you hurt?"

Sakura shook her head, mentally cursing herself. It was as if the moment he turned around, all of her fear and trepidation ceased to exist. She knew it was her subconscious using its last ditch effort to see him again, to be near him. Squeezing her eyes shut, she stood back up and steadied herself. "I just got light headed. I'm fine."

"You need to eat." He pulled his pack around to the front and snatched a wrapped granola bar. It had no taste but she chewed, keeping her eyes glued to the bar. She could feel him watching her and knew if she looked up, she wouldn't be able to control it. "Thank you."

"We're only a few hours away. Do you think you'll be able to make it?"

No. "Yeah, I'll be fine."

She had no more episodes on their way back to the main road. It felt weird passing by the outpost they had camped beside on the journey a few weeks ago. Things had been so different. Why hadn't she been able to leave well enough alone then? Oh, but she just had to know. She had to keep pushing until she got her way.

The entire way, Kakashi kept himself just a few steps ahead of her. She had tried to close the gap, to make him look at her but he was aware of what she tried to do and put even more distance between them.

Her heart raced as the village walls came into view. No. She didn't want this to be the end. She wanted so much more. Could she fake being hurt again? Could she faint to get him to hold her one last time? God she sounded ridiculous. He obviously didn't want to be around her. That hurt more than anything else.

He waved up at Genma who sat on the wall, swinging his legs as he looked out toward the road. "Kakashi! You finally make it back? You'll never guess what happened!" The nin leapt from the wall and landed next to Kakashi. They threw their arms around each other and Sakura could only watch as he laughed at Genma's story as if everything was absolutely normal. Sakura pursed her lips and pushed past them, heading in to the gates. If he wanted to be an asshole, then fine. She could be just as bitchy. She signed her name, barely legible on the sheet, and glanced back at Kakashi out of the corner of her eye. He made no move to follow her. "Don't forget your mission report, Kakashi-sensei." She mumbled to him before turning toward the district where Kyo's apartment was. It was protocol to have an examination at the hospital but that was the last thing she wanted to do.

If her life was going back to normal, then she wanted to get a head start. She wanted to soak in her bathtub for at least an hour and she wanted her fiancé to dote on her and give her the attention she should be craving. And no matter how much her body screamed in protest, begging her to turn around and run into Kakashi's arms, she didn't.

AN- and this is where they leave us...but not for long. I decided to split the story up into two parts and I'll be writing a few short one-shots from Kakashi's point of view. This is Sakura's story ultimately, but he needs his voice too. Thank you so much for all your reviews, all those who favorited the story and me!


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